Ask Haruhi and The SOS Brigade!
by Dria-kun
Summary: Ever wonder if there's a time when Kyon isn't bored? Haruhi isn't so dominant? Mikuru isn't adorable? I wonder myself....Ask the brigade! I beg of you! They dont eat till you ask!
1. Intro

*Ask The Haruhi SOS Brigade*

Hey,Dria-kun here! You may know me from the Ask Negi story,teehee. Well now i've captured the greatest, the grandest,  
The very very bored Kyon!!!

Dria:So how are you Kyon-kun?  
Kyon: ? And where are we?  
Dria; You needn't worry, dear.  
Kyon: Yeah, because i'm just goin to beleive that.  
Dria: You kissed Haruhi.  
Kyon.  
Dria; And you're here to answer questions along with said Haruhi-chan and SOS brigade!  
Kyon: W-where are they?  
Dria: oh i knocked them out. they're over in that corner there.  
Kyon; M--m-m-m-miss Asahina!!! S-s-she's...she's.  
Dria: Naked? yes i caught them off gaurd.  
Kyon: and-and-and Haruhihihihihiii.  
Dria: Your mouth is hangin' lower than warm taffee on a cast iron pole.  
Kyon: t-t-that makes no sense.  
Dria: Wasn't supposed to Honey.  
Haruhi:Kyooon....kun.  
Dria: Oops! They're wakin' up! Well send your questions in via review I'll get to you soon! BaiBai!  
Mikuru:*SHRIEEEEEK*  
Dria: Whu-oh. Gotta zoom. 


	2. Q1

***Ask The SOS Brigade!***

Well well, i see we have our very first questions! And so soon! But only two, so c'mon people!

Ask away, i'm here all week! and month...and year...well,you get it.

**facexorxvalue**

**OK, Dria, I'll contribute to any insanity you can come up with.**

**1. Kyon, you seem like a smart guy, so why do you only get average grades?**

Kyon: I don't know...who cares?

Dria: Kyon-chan!! be nice! These people contribute to your food rations!

Kyon...well maybe because I'm always getting dragged around by Haruhi...god this is idiotic...

**2. Itsuki, what do you reeaally enjoy doing when your bored?**

Itsuki: Well I suppose playing Othello…well, that and drinking tea miss Asahina serves *smile* Kyon: I agree with that ^^ Mikuru: Oh!*blush* Haruhi: Grrrr….kyooooon!! Dria: Ooookay next question!!!! Hurry before she kills us all!!!

**3. Haruhi, if you were all-powerful, what would you do first?**

Haruhi: Wai?! Well duh, I'd make things waaaay more interesting! Of course all these normal humans would have to go. Well, maybe I'll keep a few around...For…eh, scientific reasons…

Kyon: *whisper* She sounds like she's already planned this…uh-oh.

Dria:*whisper*I know, this is not good.

Haruhi: I'd definitely keep Kyon arou---AH!

Dria: Oooh Ha-chaaaaan!!

Haruhi: I didn't—I mean I—*blush*

Kyon: well…um…NEXT QUESTION!!! *blush*

**Loveberry101**

**Lol!  
ok, here goes:  
Yuki, wat is ur fave book and why?**

Yuki: "The Girl Who Jumped Through Time"…it's…unique.

Mikuru: T-t-the girl w-who…?!

Kyon: Ehh d-don't worry about it…

Haruhi: Wai! Is that any good?? Lend it to me!!! Lend it to me!!!

Itsuki: It was quite good, if I recall…

Haruhi: Yuuukiiii!!**  
Mikuru, how do most boys react to your total moe-ness?**

Mikuru: M-m-my…my…*glance at Kyon and Itsuki* How do you react…to what???

Kyon&Itsuki: *anime slide* That's why you're so cute!**  
Can i ask someone who is dead? If so, then Ryoko, who was your closest friend?(if you had one)**

**Dria: **Er, sorry, only the SOS Brigade is here, I can't afford to feed anybody sai.

Well thanks! Arigato!! Please ask us more! Kyon looks bored….*pops Kyon* Don't look so bored!!

Kyon: Waaaaaat?!

Dria: That's better.

Itsuki:Seems as though Haruhi is quiet today, but Dria's making up for it, huh?

Haruhi: Quiet?! Why---I'm just—

Yuki: Still embarrassed??

Haruhi: *boiling into rage* Waaaaaaai!?!

Itsuki: Nagato-san, if you please…

Yuki: Thank you and please ask more questions via review. We appretiate your thoughts.**  
**


	3. Q3

***Ask the SOS Brigade!***

Well well, we're back again with some even better questions!!! And Kyon doesn't look as bored so….

Time for lunch! And I'm very sorry, but no matter how much food you donate…I can't bring back the dead. Although with Hellsend's zombie plan…nah. Have some Yakisoba on Facexorxvalue!

Kyon: Finnally some food!!!

Yuki: Thank you.

Mikuru: Oh, why thank you…er yes suzumiya-san?

Haruhi: You know the drill*sluuuuurp*

Mikuru: Ohhh….ah…*Slips into maid outfit, begins serving noodles*

Itsuki: Thank you for the food.

Dria: Ok enough nonsense!!! On with the questions!!!

**Hellsender**

**To the SOS Brigade:**

What's your Zombie Plan? (The time when the entire Earth will be infested with Zombies)

Haruhi: Now THAT sounds interesting! Right Kyon-kun?!

Kyon: Yeah…sure…I guess…

Yuki: Zombies. The famed Hollywood interpretations of flesh-eating undead. Commonly seen wobbling around screaming "brains. brains."

Mikuru: Aaaaaaiiiieeeee!!!!!

Itsuki: Now, now. There, there.

Haruhi: Yeah, totally! I can soooo see that! An entire flesh-eating army will show any alien that our planet is just as powerful as theirs! Or,or, or time travelers will see this time period as amazing and all come here!! Everyone will bow down to my army!

Kyon: YOUR army?

Haruhi: Of course. I AM the ultra-director *smiles*

**MJKalasky**

**To the SOS Brigade:**

What are your favorite video games?

All: Why the New Haruhi Suzumiya game out next month for PS2 and Wii!

**Tyran**

**I've got a question for each member:  
Haruhi: suppose you found a guy that shares each of your interests. What would you do first? **

Haruhi: Well…i…um…This is a trick question!!! I am not under liberation to answer this!*blush*

Kyon:*uh, YES you are!*

Haruhi: Um…*whisper*

All:huh??

Haruhi: ….*mumble*…club…look…mysteries…normal human…

Dria: Uh…ok…sorry, we'll get it out of her next time!**  
Yuki: are there any non-humaniod interfaces?**

Yuki: Yes, they are in the forms of toasters, coffee makers and PC's that seem to hate people. In reality they are AI's that are terribly bored and have nothing better to do.  
**Mikuru: do you have any relationships in your own time?**

Mikuru: *cute grin* That's classified!*excited giggle*

Kyon:*Anime shock* She looks like she's in love!**  
Itsuki: what is holland? XD**

Itsuki: Well…a country right?

Yuki: Isn't it your brotherhoods' secret b----

Itsuki: NOOOO!! *smile* That's a conspiracy theory, like aliens time travelers….ESPers…**  
Kyon: have you had a girlfriend prior to meeting Haruhi and the others?**

Kyon: Um…that's classified?*glance at Haruhi* Haruhi: Welllllllllll Kyon? We're waaaaaaaiting! Kyon: Urm…well…no…I never found anybody interested in what I like… *Aliens ESPers and time travelers, that is. Haruhi: Ahohohohoho! What a loserrrrr!!*noogie*

Dria: Well, thanks! That really got us going, huh? And I see a little romance going as well!

Kyon&Haruhi: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!?!

Dria:*dodging Haruhi superflyingtacklepounce* Ok, keep the questions rolling!! Lets try for at least five ok? That'll bring my homemade bentous! (which actually kick butt if I may add ^^) Yuki if you'd please!

Yuki: Please leave us more questions via review. Your thoughts are appreciated and pondered.

Kyon:*pondered?!*

Yuki: We'll see you next time.


	4. actually Q4

fan**********Ask the SOS Brigade*********

All right! Well we got a ton!(because I'm cool like that) We have some REALLY HARD questions today, and I'm excited! Thanks to your donations and questions I was able to afford ingredients to make my awesome bentous! They seem to be enjoying them anyways*Beams* Uh…Mikuru you have some rice on your face….

Mikuru: Oh! Sorry!*brush brush*

Dria: Damn she's sooooo cute!! On with the question!! (Oh, I say hello to Chris and sexy John-pyon!)

…………………………………………………………………………………**.. **

**THIRD-IMPACT-end-of-humanity**

**"What would you say your individual theme songs are?"**

_Itsuki_: I would say…"_Sukiyaki"_…a quiet beautiful song with a silly name ^^

_Kyon_: Um…"_American Woman"_…for obvious reasons. (Dria: aw cut it out you luv her!)

_Mikuru_: "_Sugar Baby"_!

_Kyon_: * what? That's a rap from a Sailor Moon fanatic?!*

_Haruhi_: "_Hare Hare Yukai"_. What else??

*All stare at Yuki…Staaaaaaare*

_Yuki_: "_Fly Me to The Moon."_

_Dria_: um…ok… (Yes that was both an alien and Evangelion ref, lol)

**"If the world were to end, what would spend your last days doing?"**

_Itsuki_: Well, I'd enjoy the show…right Kyon?

_Yuki_: computer.

_Kyon_: Whatta ya mean SHOW?!

_Mikuru_: Um…classified again, sorry.

_Haruhi_: I had a dream about that once…*blush**starts messing with hair***  
"John smith."  
**_Dria:_ What?! That's not---

_Yuki:___Pocahontas is the thirty-third animated feature in the Disney animated features canon. It was produced by Walt Disney Feature Animation in April 15, 1994 and was originally released to selected theaters on June 16, 1995 by Walt Disney Pictures. The film is the first Disney film to be based on a real historic character, based on the known fact of the real historical story and also the folklore and legend that surround the Native American woman Pocahontas, and features a fictionalized account of her encounter with Englishman John Smith.

_Dria_: Well…all righty then.**  
Haruhi: If Kyon were to die (In front of your eyes in a horrible and bloody fashion) and had a few seconds to live...what would you use those seconds to do?**

Haruhi: What?! Who--?!

Kyon: Omygawd WHY am I dying?!

Haruhi: Y-yeah! It's not a legit question if w-we don't know ALL the d-details!

Dria:*A good answer that Haruhi might say when not in front of Kyon: She already has seen that incident a few seconds before it really happened, and she wouldn't have it any other way.

Haruhi:*whisper* I-I would not!!**  
Kyon: Watch any good anime lately? How about FLCL? Good, now can you compare your life to that sack of madness?**

Kyon: Believe me; Takun has nothing on this insane asylum.

**Yuki: With those bored AI, can you prevent any more of those things from infecting my computer? It got the BSOD earlier.**

Yuki: I cannot interfere with the will of those I am not involved with. It is outside my jurisdiction. Have you tried banging it with a shoe? It seems to work for Kyon.

**Itsuki: Mikuru is an awfully attractive member of the SOS brigade. Have you had any..."Thoughts" of...you know...**

Itsuki: Miss Asahina is a very attractive young woman. So I suppose if either of us were able, I would consider maybe taking her out for dinner. ^^**  
Mikuru: DO you think Haruhi is lesbian? I mean, she does grope and...to be blunt...RAPE you...**

Mikuru: Wha--!? N-no! Miss Suzumiya i-is in lov---I mean…no I do not think so.*looks afraid*

* * *

**Yojimbo89**

**Kyon WHAT IS YOUR NAME**

Kyon: Finally SOMEONE cares enough to ask!! It's---

Haruhi: OMYGAWD LOOK AT THAT!! ITS SOME ALIEN DEVICE!!!

*All look over*

Yuki:*holds up cell phone with eggplant clip* I got it in a cereal box…**  
Yuki do you still go to the computer club**

Yuki: Occasionally, yes.**  
Haruhi how many guys have YOU dated**

Haruhi: Urrrg…I lost track…**  
Itsuki WHY THE HELL DO YOU SMILE SO MUCH**

**Itsuki HOW THE HELL CAN YOU SMILE SO MUCH THAT HAS TO HURT YOUR FACE AT SOME POINT*taken as one question***

Itsuki: I have no real reason to frown. It's all in the lips*smiiiile**sparkle**sparkle*

Dria: Waaaa! My eyes!!! The shiiiiine!

**Mikuru ...to Moeh can't think of anything to ask**

Mikuru: Um…all right…

* * *

**Crazy-project-spawn**

**Yuki: Can you fall in love?**

Yuki: It depends. Can you?**  
Kyon: What is your hobby before Haruhi came to your life?**

Kyon: What are you suggesting HARUHI is my hobby?*sigh* Well I guess I was just your average otaku, huh? **  
Itsuki: Do you love Mikuru in some way/form?**

Itsuki: Why yes, she is an amazing friend and colleague. *smiiiiiile*

Dria: Ok, ok, we get it, blue ribbon teeth.

**Mikuru: Little sister...why did you steal MY time machine?!**

Mikuru: T-time machine?! I-I travel by…THAT'S CLASSIFIED!!!* covers face***  
Haruhi: What do you do when a random guy asks you out? Do you mutilate them and threaten castration?**

Haruhi: You know it!*air high five*

Kyon: I thought you couldn't say no?

Haruhi: Have you ever SEEN a guy who asked me out?

Kyon: *good lord what does she DO to them?!**anime shock*

* * *

**Anon of 4chan**

Haruhi: why do you love Kyon?  
Haruhi: Who says that I do!? I mean it could've been hot that day when I wore the ponytail!

Kyon: nobody said anything about a ponytail…

Dria: OOOH! Busted Harutchi!  
Kyon: How much money do you make? Seriously, financing the entire brigade whenever you go out must be straining on your wallet.

Haruhi: Only when he buys lunch ^^  
**Nagato: What's your gamerscore?  
**Yuki: I am sorry…what is gamerscore?

Dria: Um…yuki-chan… Yeah, we tried to show her an Xbox, but she sorta…dismantled it…  
**Mikuru: Ever considered modeling?  
**Mikuru: Oh I...um…

Haruhi: Yeah…you definitely have the body for it…*griiin*

Kyon: Miss Asahina! Run!!!  
**Itsuki: Do you ever win at ANYTHING?**

**I**tsuki: Why yes.

Kyon: At what?

Itsuki: Being friends with all of you.

Dria&Mikuru: Awwww!

Haruhi: Aw, don't be so soft.*secret smile*

Ok well that concludes this Q&A! Yuki would you take us out???

Yuki: Thank you, please leave your questions via review. Your thought are appreciated and pondered. Thank you.


	5. Q5

*****************Ask The SOS Brigade!!!!!******************************

Well, its been so LOOOOONG since I posted for this thing! I figure I may as well bring it back up! So we have a super-palooza of questions today, and I would sincerely like to apologize for accidentally repeating a chapter, lol. Well, any-whoozit, we definitely had enough questions to bake a bignourmous 12 layer chocolate cake! Um…I ate 3 layers though, sorry. So…a bignourmous 9-layer chocolate cake!!!

Thanks from us all!!!

* * *

**Imaperson**

**Haruhi: Kyon has wronged you greatly. He has destroyed your family, your home, and everything you know and love. What will you do to him as punishment? Will you even give him a punishment?**

I am so evil :D

Haruhi: Whaaaaaat? Kyon! What the hell did you do you ba--- Dria: Haru, kyon hasn't DONE anything, ya goon! Kyon: *sheesh, 4 seconds in and I already have a death wish?!* Haruhi: Well, I'd castrate him! To staaaaaart… ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

**eliasbloodmoon**

**Here are some questions.**

To everyone in the brigade except for Haruhi:Do you know any other beings that reach the level of demi-god or higher besides Haruhi, ie Cthulhu, Nodens, Nyarlathotep... (Shout out to all my Call of Cthulhu playing friends)  
Itsuki: No, no one has heard of anything quite yet.

Yuki: negative.

Mikuru: well, I did travel back 2000 years ago and met je---That's classified!!! Sorry!!!

Haruhi: Kyon! Let go of my ears for Gods' sake!!!

Kyon: Believe me, girl, it IS for gods' sake.*anime sweat*

Yuki: You seem to be an emotionless person. Do you feel any emotions at all.  
Yuki. Yes.

Dria: …care to further that thought?

Yuki: no,  
Mikuru: Are there any evil time travlers in your time, and if so have you fought any?

Mikuru: why yes! My older sister Mikare! She---eep! Classified, a-again!!! Kyon: *do you mean to tell me you battled your own sister?! Was she just as cute?* Haruhi: Kyon! Get your head out of the clouds!*BAM!*

* * *

**White Rosary**

**^^  
Seems nice enough.  
Okay, questions.  
1 What does Suzumiya-san think of doppelgangers?**

Haruhi: Dopplegangers, eh? Hmm….beautiful! Kyon! *point*

Kyon:*god, you've given her ideas* What?

Haruhi: You just got a role in the movie! Imagine this! Itsuki actually has an evil twin, who can use a BLACK phsici! And, and he's like, really cute, as compared to the real itsuki, and koizumi's already a looker, LOLz! * elbows Itsuki* it'll be a hit with the ladies!

Itsuki: Haha, thank you Haruhi, you flatter me!* smiiiiiiile*

Dria: Oh crap….it returns…..wait, haru-chan, you think Kyons hot?

Kyon: *still frozen in shock* nnnnn….

Haruhi: *still babbling about movie and begins to undress Mikuru*

Dria: Uh whoa babe, next question, quick!

**2 What does Suzumiya-san think of doppelgangers in another world, but with different genders? Like, Kyon is a girl, but with the same personality..  
People seem to have that idea. Kyon is called Kyonko, and you, little missy, is called Haruki. **

Dria: Oh god bless you, not another genderblender…

Kyon&Haruhi: ??!?!!?

Haruhi: That's disgusting! Ugh, I cant eve begin to imagine kyon as a female! Eeeewww!!!

Kyon: *evil grin* Why, can't bear to lose me as an option?

Haruhi: *glaaaaaaaaaaare* no, dumbass, I'd still be a guy. But you probably make a buutt-ugly girl. Flat-chested, stringy hair, I bet. ^^ I mean you're not much of a looker now.

Dria: Jeez, talk about a killjoy.

**  
3 Suzumiya-san, this is a private question to Nagato-san. Er-hm. You are smart enough to have emotions, but why do you not have emotions?**

Yuki: I do have emotions. I just do not care.

* * *

**THIRD-IMPACT-end-of-humanity**

**( this is my man right here lol)**

**Yuki... about Rei ayanami, have you ever found yourself relatable?  
Yuki: Yes. Our hair is the same colour, lol.**

Dria: First of all, did YUKI just say lol? And second, yeah, there has got to be a LOT more than the hair, yukitchi…

Yuki: ROFLMAO

Kyon: Holy crap, there has got to be something we don't know…

Dria: Nah,ya THINK?!

**Kyon... NOW IT IS YOUR TURN! :D  
Haruhi is pretty damned cute...Do you like her in a certain way? :3 By the way, Mikuru is only a crush, eh?**  
Kyon: Yeah, I like her in that special way you like a pet monkey that is constantly throwing shi* at you for fun, and you can't get rid of it because your family says it's your responsibility.

Itsuki: Guilty as charged *smiiiile*

Dria: Again with the smile, urg…Haru?

Haruhi: SINCE WHEN DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON MIKURU?!

Kyon: ohhh, here we go.*braces self,*

**  
Mikuru: Have you ever had a relationship (Yuri and others count)?**  
Mikuru: Teehee*winku* That's classified! * giggle giggle!*

Kyon:*this cant be happening! That look! She is so in love!*

**Haruhi: If You were given a guitar with epic powers, what would you use it for?  
**Haruhi: WOOOOH! Rock concert of the century! I still, I still I love you, im waiting waiting forever!

Dria; She would use it to take over the world, wouldn't she?

Haruhi: I ALMOST DROPPED MY MUSIC!!!!

Kyon: You butter believe it.

**Itsuki: If you don't stop smiling, I will personally kill you myself. How does that make you feel, you smiley bastard?**

Itsuki: *teary* it…just makes me feel so happy….that you would think about me! I think its amazing!

*smiiiiiiiiile!!!*

Dria: Jeez, now you've done it. Kyon: MY EEEEEEEEYES!!! Mikuru: EEEEK! Yuki: Ouch…

* * *

**HellSender**

**To the SOS Brigade:  
If you each owned a light saber what color would you want it to be?  
**Haruhi: Well, it would depend on what day it was….but normally, I guess red.

Kyon: Hell, I'll go generic and say blue.

Mikuru: Pink! Pink! Its so kawaii!!

Kyon: *no, you're the kawaii one!*

Itsuki: I think I like yellow. It's a very bright, sunny color * smiiiiile*

Yuki: White…*secret blush*

Kyon: *what is she thinking of?!*  
**To Kyon:  
If Mikuru and Yuki confessed their feelings for you, would you go with them instead of Haruhi?**

Kyon: Heck yeaH! I'm far better off with them any day! Haruhi: YUKI! GET MY RUSTY CHAINSAW!!!! Yuki: Yes… Kyon: Aw, hell…

* * *

**ValarSpawn**

**Itsuki: I've noticed you seem to be holding back but I'll ask anyway; assume that you could date any of the female SOS-Dan members (Mikuru included despite situation between her faction and yours), who would you date ()?  
**Itsuki: Oh, well, definitely Mikuru. She's the perfect housewife-esque girl. Sweet and nice, good with household chores, sweet, and nice…uuhhh….

Haruhi: Humph!*glaaaaare*

Kyon: What? C'mon, like you'd be a spectacular housewife…

Haruhi: What's this talk of wives and marriage and crap?! We need to be focused on the SOS Brigade's main objective: keeping me happy!

Kyon: Urrrr…

Itsuki: She's right you know…

Kyon: If you don't shut up, I will punch you in the face, you smiley bastard.

**Mikuru: How and when did you meet Tsuruya?**

Mikuru: OH! I met her right after the school term! She was quite nice to me, and we've been friends ever since!

Dria: Wow, we got a straight answer for once. THANK YOU VALARSPAWN!

**Kyon: Who is Sasaki?**

Kyon: An old, ah, friend of mine.

Haruhi: *grumble grumble

Itsuki: Remind me to apologize to Fujiwara again.

Kyon: Sure, maybe he'll tell us his real name…sneering bastard…

Dria: * you're one to talk!!!*

**Haruhi: What would you wish for on Tanabata**?

Haruhi: WORLD DOMINATION!

Kyon: It seems she's moving from finding fun things and moving on to dominatrix mode.

Yuki: LOL

Dria: Oh, not again. Kyon! Try banging her with a shoe!

Kyon: Hell no.

**Yuki: Are you into any sci-fi shows (example: Doctor Who,Stargate...)?**

Yuki: Star…trek….Sagittarius III…

* * *

yojimbo89

**Itsuki why do you all ways get close to kyon**

Itsuki: Well, he's such a good friend of mine, I figured our relationship would be somewhere on that level.

Kyon: Ok, stop, just stop. You know, it things like that that you say that make people think we're gay for each other.

Haruhi: * giggle* aren't you?

Kyon: NO!

**yuki how many books do you read in say a week**

Yuki: 4,739. Last week I broke my record of approximately 5000.

Dria:L Ok, yuki is amazing. Such good answers. You too Mikuru! Have a cookie!

Mikuru;' Thank you! *crunch*

Dria: *ahhhh! Love!*

**haruhi where do you find all those outfits and how do you get the money for them (hidding in a fallout bunker in an unknown area of space)**

Haruhi: Huh? Oh, well, I've kinda just got it lying around in my room. Real otaku find ways~! And im Mikuru's biggest fan! *implied ear rape*

Mikuru:*AAAAHHH!!*

Haru: Aw, you know you like it! *nom*  
**Kyon what's your sister's name**

Haruhi: Imoto-chan!!!

Kyon: No, that's not---

Haruhi: IMOTO-CHAAAAN!

Kyon: Forget it.

Dria: Oh yeah that reminds me!....mumble mumble…

**  
to the girls what are your 3 sizes**

Haruhi: I'm not gonna---

Yuki: 32 B…

Haruhi: HAHAH! I've got you beat Yuki-chan! 34C!!! Mikuru! What about you?! What about you! * Implied rape*

Mikuru: AAAAH! Th-thirty-six d-double D!!!

Haruhi: Whoa! Im jealous girl! * begins to grope Mikuru*

Mikuru: EEEK!

Kyon& Dria: OK OK! That enough of THAT!

**  
dria-kun thanks for asking my questions**

Dria; Oh, you're quite welcome! Thanks for asking!

* * *

**Pierre7291**

**Haruhi:Haruhi if i were to say i am an Alien could i join the SOS Brigade [0.o i'm not saying i am]**  
Haruhi: Well, not if you just said it! Of course you'd have to PROVE it! Like, take me into your mother ship, or name me alien ambassador with your leader, you know, typical, run-of-the mill things.

Kyon: * Haruhi, I thought you didn't want typic- what am I saying? Theres nothing typical about alien leaders!

Yuki: LOL

Dria: I give up.

**Yuki: Yuki do you have any hobbies that interest you other than reading or being on the computer?  
**Yuki: Fortunes. I am quite accurate.

Kyon: Like I said, it's not about accuracy.

**Mikuru:Do you know any Martial Arts like Judo or Karate?  
**Mikuru: Oh, well, I…no. no I don't.

Kyon: If she did, she wouldn't be constantly harassed by the lunatic over there.

Haruhi: And what exactly is that supposed to mean!?

Kyon: You know exactly what it mean, you freak.

**Kyon:If you were going to die how would you want to die?  
**Kyon: well, I suppose with my family and dear wife and children surrounding my deathbed, telling me how much they loved me, sending me into the afterlife with good wishes and fond memories.

Haruhi: Pffft. What a load of bull. Like you'll ever get married. And kids? Right, whatever. I thought you the kids?

Kyon: you know, its not a bad idea ok? I can have some semblance of a rom—wait, who says I hate kids?

Haruhi: *Blush* well, it's just the way you act around Imoto-chan I figured…aw forget it! It's not like you'd even know!

Kyon: *know what?!*

**Itsuki: What does Esper mean?**

Dria: Oh for the love of corn… REALLY?! Itsuki: now, now, dria, it's a valid question. Esper is simply a being capable of using ESP, or phsycic powers. You know, ESPer? Dria; And he was doing so well! Itsuki: don't mind, don't mind.

* * *

Leon Woon

**Haruhi: Did you fall in love with Kyon when he first kissed you?  
**Haruhi": That loser never k-kissed me! W-what would make you say such a d-disgusting thing!!!?

Kyon: *BLUSH!*

Dria: Note: *Haruhi thinks that was a dream!

**Kyon: How many times in a week do you dream of Haruhi when you sleep?  
**Kyon: Uh, between 5 and….NONE!!!! What are you nuts?

Dria: This is fun. I'm having fun now.

**Mikuru: Are you really Kyon's sister?  
**Mikuru: No, of course not! Teehee, we don't even look alike, silly! What a silly question!

**Yuki: Would you get married if you had the chance?  
**Yuki: No. Marriage is irrelevant to my interests.  
**Itsuki: How many girls exactly have ever confessed to you?**

Itsuki: Oh, quite a few. Hmm, something like 20 in the past year or so, I believe. Kyon: *Don't gloat you bastard!*

* * *

facexorxvalue

**im back! okay, i got in idea. if i send money, can you bring characters who arent dead? or maybe the genderbended editions?**

Dria: Actually, I kinda reconsidered on this! Im going to bring in RYOKO and IMOTA-CHAN, and we will have a gender-blending day, so stay tuned!

**kyon: dude, your my favorite character on this show, but why do so many people dislike you?**

Kyon: I guess they just don't have good taste, heh. Not that I really have time to care what with this idiot dragging me around to random hings…ugh…I hate my life.

Haruhi: UGH! You are so despicable! I hate you!

Kyon: Wow, big word. Sure you understood it?

Haruhi: Idiot! Moron! Jerk!

**haruhi: sorry, but i thought you were in love with kyon. if you are'nt, can i take him on a date?(blush)**

Haruhi: *blush* NO! I mean! I meeeean, that he has club duties to fulfill! Like, finishing the w-website or, uh, ironing Mikuru's outfits! Yeah!

Kyon: Wow, Haruhi, you do care.

Haruhi: I'M NOT JEALOUS!!!

Kyon: Agh! Didn't say you were!

**mikuru: do you actually like any clothing that haruhi makes you wear?**

Mikuru: Ah! Well, I suppose I do like the maid outfit, a little, but I'v just grown accustomed to it, I guess. Oh! I really like the frog outfit!

Dria: Why, cuz it completely covers you?

Mikuru: Ah-heh?

Dria: *giggle* I thought so!

**yuki: if you were to accidently leave a book at school, would you break in to get it back?(lame** **question)**

Yuki: Yes.

Kyon: don't doubt what this girl would do for a book. She's broken into a library before…*mumble* and dismantled my xbox 360…

Dria: *patting Kyon*I know…don't worry, buddy, we still have the original…

* * *

Cherry Blossom Haiku

**guess I'll give it a try?  
**  
**Kyon: When will you get off your lazy ** and ask Haruhi out?  
**Kyon: No way in frigging hell will I ever ask out that masochistic, psychotic freak. Haruhi: Jeez, kyon, that hurts. Hurts real bad. Kyon: Shut up.  
**well, that's it. I've got nothing.  
**  
**-Cherry-chan**

Dria: Thanks Cherry-chan! Cute name btw!

* * *

keeperofthedarkarts

**to all: you guys don't seem to have a life outside of the club, well except for yuki, and mikuru, what happened to all your parents? seriously and teachers...**

kyon: Well, my parents are at home, and they really don't care. I have a pretty good family life, I guess, even if they are annoying like nobody's business.'

Haruhi: Yeah, me too. Me and my dad used to be pretty close but…not so much anymore.

Itsuki: I lived with my two older brothers until I moved here. Now im on my own, I guess.

Mikuru: I live in Tsuruya's neighborhood, but im on my own too.

Yuki:…

Kyon: Yeah, yuki, we all know your home situation.

Haruhi: Yuki has a "situation"? what? When did this happen? Are her parents divorced? Dead, or horribly mutilated and in the hospital suffering from 10 year duel comas? Huh, huh Which is it?

All: *holding breath for answer*

Yuki: Parental units live in America.

Haruhi: Is that all? Pfft, how boring.

Kyon: Shut up. I'm not afraid to punch you.

* * *

YinYangWhiteTiger

**To Itsuki:**

**Do you love Kyon?  
**Itsuki: With a blinding passion.

Kyon: Reeeeeeh!?!?!?

Itsuki: Just kidding!

Kyon: * yeah right you smiley bastard!

**To Mikuru:**

**XD Are you in love with anyone? Maybe in the future... say yes or no. That can't be THAT classified  
**Mikuru: Oh it's not classified, just personal, teehee.*giggle*

**To Haruhi:**

**no life-form left. Because sooner or later Normal is everything. Loving, Killing and all those too sweet and very sicken thing :D Humans all walk in circle doing the same thing always... If "normal" people were destroyed- there be**  
Haruhi: You….are delusional. That mad no sense whatsoever. What drugs are you taking?

Dria: HARUHI!

Haruhi: What? Its true.

Dria: If you're rude, they won't come back.

Haruhi; Great. Sooner they leave, sooner _I_ leave.

Dria: True, true. But stop or I'll give kyon your food rations.

Haruhi: REH?!

Kyon: WOOH!

**Kyon:**

**What do you think about the gays XD ?  
**Kyon: Don't have anything against him, he just freaks me ou- oh! GAYS, as in plural! Ooooh….

Dria: Jeez, you are obsessed with Itsuki, aren't you?

Kyon: No offense, Koizumi, but you are just…weird.

Itsuki: That's okay, no offense taken. * smiiiiile*  
**To Everybody:  
Does the SOS Bridge have a HUGE love traingle of LOVE?**

Dria: YES!!! Kyon: God, probably .Haruhi: There better NOT be!!!! Itsuki: We'll just have to wait and find out! Mikuru: Em…*blush* Yuki: Yes. Lol. Dria: Geez, again?

* * *

Hakumei no Majo

**'Kay, I have a question for Kyon-kun! ^^  
**  
**Kyon...if you had to choose...would you rather have your normal life back, or stay with your crazy life? And for what reasons?**

Kyon: Well…it's a hard decision, because I really appreciated my old life after meeting the members of the SOS brigade. And I wouldn't have met anybody if Haruhi hadn't kidnapped them. So, I wish I could have all the people I know now, just without the hassle of all the sci-fi crap. So…yeah, I think I'd take the lazy route and stick with the life I have now. Haruhi: …Kyon…*teary* *I didn't know you felt that way…* Kyon: What, ya little blood-sucker? Haruhi: KYON!!! RAWR!!!* superdeadlyflyingtacklepounce*

* * *

Kaos and Magnus

**Kaos and Magnus: Nice show there, great work indded, now we'll ask our questions:  
**  
**From Magnus:  
**  
**Kyon: I've noticed how much you care for Yuki's happiness and confort, do you love her? (Don't look at Haruhi)  
**Kyon: Well, to tell the truth, she's just like a fragile little…supergenious…kid. Sorta naïve and all that. So yeah, I guess I love her like a kid sister. Jeez, im a frigging charmer today, huh?

Dria: Not after that comment, kyon-kun.

**Yuki: You always look at Kyon for permission, is because he is the only one with common sense?, or you actually like him? (Don't look at Kyon for the answer)  
**Yuki: Kyon is main trigger of Suzumiya. Every action is relayed to him, and in return to her.

Kyon: Holy shiza, that's not good, I it.

Yuki: *shakes head*

**Yuki and Kyon: If the danger of Haruhi ending the world didn't exist, will you date, or even marry?**

Yuki: If the Suzumiya's powers were nonexistent, I would be as well.

Kyon: In other words, no because she wouldn't even be here.  
Yuki: LOL

Kyon: Are you screwing with us?

Yuki: LOL

**From Kaos:  
**  
**Kyon: Why don't you punch Itsuki on the face already?, i assure you it will feel great!  
**Kyon: I assure you, I've really considered this, but, I mean, come one. His teeth must be made of titanium, and I don't feel like breaking my hands anytime soon.

Itsuki: *smiiiiile*

Kyon: Oh, god how I want to.

**Yuki: If Kyon were to cosplay a videogame hero, who would you like him to be?  
**Yuki:..Shinji…

Dria: YES!!! SHE SAID IT!

Kyon: *what, was she scripted???*

**Mikuru: Same question as Yuki and... will you date me?  
**Mikuru: Sorry, I'm not seeing anybody at the moment, teehee! But, I'd like to see him dress up as…oh, Zach from FFVI?

Dria: …im in love with you Mikuru. COME 'ERE!!! *implied rape*

Haruhi: OOH! Let me in on some of that action! * Implied Gang-rape*

Kyon: Aw, crap, ive lost my only ally.

**Haruhi: Are you interested on the Mythos of Cthuluh?, Demonology? or something more dark and cool (No offence to Yuki or Mikuru, but total offence to Itsuki)  
**Haruhi: You, know, I did own a kappa for a short while! Look, here I'll go get it.

Dria&Mikuru: NOOOOO!!!*angry and scared respectively*

Kyon: We gave that knock off back to the computer club pres, remember?

Haruhi: Awww….darn.

**Itsuki: How many times have you tried to kiss Kyon?  
**Itsuki: *smiiiiile*

Kyon: *why are you smiling…why are you smiling?!!?!*

**Magnus: Well, those are our questions (please forgive my brother for his... behaviour...), keep the good work.  
**  
**Kaos: Hey!, I'm not even sorry!**

**Dria:Neither am I, that was hilarious! Thx!**

* * *

DelinquentDuo

**Question for Yuki: Would you mind smiling for me? Even just a little one will do.**

Yuki: No. Dria: YUKI! Smile, please? What if I had mini Ryoko in her baby chair? Yuki: *Snicker* Dria: Woot! * penguin voice*I did it!

* * *

leonazo

**WOW! A great idea of fanfic and really fun indeed, i have some questions:  
**  
**To boys: Are you stupid or something? Come on, THREE beautiful girls and you do nothing.  
**Itsuki: Well, I suppose I just don't see my friends in such a way, haha.* smiiiiile* Dria: Yeah, 'cuz you got a thing out for Kyon-kun… Itsuki: What was that? Dria: Nothing!!! Kyon: God, this is ridiculous. As if Haruhi would ever allow me to…nevemind. Haruhi: Allow you to WHAT?!

**To Girls: Mind if I ask all of you out on a date? :P  
**Haruhi: HELL NO!!!...i mean, well…maybe…I guess…i…. Dria: Stay strong, girl! Stay strong. Yuki: No. Mikuru: Sorry! Teehee! Kyon: * my life is over. She IS in love…*

**To Kyon: Why always so pessimist? You're living my dream!  
**Kyon: Oh, so you're dream is to be in a constant life-or-death situation, drug around by a psychotic girl who is obsessed with sci-fi crap? You have mental issues. Get help.

**To Itsuki: What kind of toothpaste do you use? A industrial one?  
**Itsuki: I use Arm&Hammer, with a hint of baking soda.*smiiiiiiiiiiiiile* Dria: Eeew….grotesque. Itsuki: Well, what do you use? Dria: Huh? Oh, uh, me…Crest prohealth. Kyon: That's not much different! Dria: *Smiiilley!*

**To Yuki: Can you put an information chip on my brain so i don't have to go to school?  
**Yuki: Data can not be transferred in such a manner. Computer chips are analog, despite common belief, and would have to be downloaded digitally to each region of you r direct brain.

**To Mikuru: Between us, you're that fragile or you're just acting? **Mikuru: Ah! Um, no. Dria: No, you're not acting, or no you are acting? Mikuru: Um…no? Dria: Sorry, she doesn't do well under pressure.

**To Haruhi: M... Bunny... (dribbling)  
**Haruhi: Freak! Dria: *staring at Mikuru* M…bunny…*drooling* Kyon: *Wow, this is awkward… *

**To Boys again: IDIOTS  
**Kyon: Whatever…

**I think that's all for know, because if I keep writing you won't be able to answer them all. Good luck with the project, is one of the funniest thing somedy come with**

* * *

Whocares

**Ta-Da! Nice job over there, i have some questions:  
**  
**To Haruhi:  
You know, you haven't said anything but did you enjoy Kyon's kiss?  
**Haruhi: WHAT?! That moron never kissed me!!!!

Dria: *snicker*

Haruhi:*BLUSH!!!*

**To Itsuki:  
What makes you so happy so as even to smile all day?  
**Itsuki: It makes me happy just to be here with all of you, to have an occasional meal, and to have all you fans out there who love us!

Kyon&Dria: Aw, can it, you sap.

**To Yuki:  
Is there anyway you could possible be more cute?  
**Yuki: Yes. I could be Mikuru.

Dria: Amen! Aw, just kidding yuki! You are adorable!

Yuki:…

**To Mikuru:  
Did you know you are your own bos- ugh!... what? Who are you? Gah!  
**Mikuru: AAAHH! Wait, what?

**To Kyon:  
If you can't stand Haruhi why do you stay with her?! If you don't like her just left her!, and if you DO like her then… well… You may know what to do.  
**Kyon: Haruhi is… tolerable. Besides, you know that whole " She can destroy the world" thing? Yeah, that's all on MY shoulders.

**To all:  
What do you think about this gender bending movement?(talking about the gender bending of Haruhi Suzumiya's story, of course)**

Dria: Oh god bless you, not another genderblender…

Kyon&Haruhi: ??!?!!?

Haruhi: That's disgusting! Ugh, I cant eve begin to imagine kyon as a female! Eeeewww!!!

Kyon: *evil grin* Why, can't bear to lose me as an option?

Haruhi: *glaaaaaaaaaaare* no, dumbass, I'd still be a guy. But you probably make a buutt-ugly girl. Flat-chested, stringy hair, I bet. ^^ I mean you're not much of a looker now.

Dria: Jeez, talk about a killjoy.

Dria: Hell, yeaH, I love copy and paste, lolz ^^

* * *

Who_died_and_made_you_L

**Itsuki: Why are you so fabulous? And so god damn handsome...*thinks inside head* "Itsuki is so dreammyy... ^_^"**

Itsuki: well, thank you. *SMIIILE!*

* * *

Exdeamon

**Hmm... this is well written enough to get involved in.  
**  
**A'right... questions questions questions...  
**  
**Kyon: You make numerous refrences to Mana points, stats, and other RPG elements. Have you ever played any tabletop RPGs like D&D? Would you be interested in joining a game? We're running out of interesting players.  
Oh, if you have played a Tabletop, what was your favourite class to play?  
further, if you were to spontaneously discover a useful supernatural ability, what would you want it be?  
**Kyon: Finnally, a relevant question. Yeah, I love tabletops, and I usually have a main character as like, a mage or wizard, or something along those lines.

Dria: Im more of a WoW girl myself. ROUGUE GNOMES KICK ARSENAL EQUITMENT!!!

**Itsuki: Given that your... *ahem* job involves shifting between Real and Closed Space, would not 'slider' suit you better? Does your 'Corporation' operate in every country in the world, or does it have a rival in other areas? Also, you seem a fan of board games, ever thought of giving Warhammer a try? (Although, yes, it might be a good idea to keep it away from The Excitable One.) Oh, and are you ever jealous of Kyon?  
**Itsuki: Well, a slider is already a person who "Slides" From dimension to dimension, so I see where you'd get the idea. However, my powers extend beyond, that, and truly, esper does not really begin to describe what I do. I am simply existent to hunt the Celestials. So I suppose the best name would be said Hunter. Thank you, that was an exquisite question. Oh, and I do like board games. My favourite so far is Trouble, by the way.

Kyon: How appropriate.

**Mikuru: Are you aware that Kyon is walking proof that your concept of space-time is flawed? Does your TPDD not infact break your very theory of time by breaking the walls of the temporal planes? And what do you put in your tea that makes it so good tot he others? As an Englishman I must know.  
**Mikuru: Oh, well, I let the tea canister sit in the sun before I brew it, or, if possible, let it brew in the sun, than heat it up through the brewer. It's quite simple, teehee.

Dria: OOH! I gotta try that! Make me some tea, Mikuru! Please?

Mikuru: Of course!

Dria: Aaahhh…livin the dream…

**Yuki: Given that when your reprogramming is recorded and reversed, it sounds suspiciously close to human programming, does this mean that human intellect is naturally approaching the programming of the universe? Have you ever met Deep Thought? Is the Answer really 42, and was the flawed Question anything like it was supposed to be?  
Oh, and hows your boss? I think I've found a way to bend reality enough to contact 'im.  
**Yuki: Good luck with that. The answer is in fact 42, the cake IS a lie, human intellect is far from deciphering the ethereal quandaries of the universe, and I have never met Deep Throat.

Dria: Thought.

Yuki: Thought.

**Haruhi: ...What do I ask? If you could change any one thing about your life as is, what would you change and why?  
Also, in the event that a supernatural event directly threatened your life, say an alien tortured you for information or a ghost possessed you and alienated your friends, what would your reaction be?  
**Haruhi: Woot! You know an alien into torture?

Kyon: Is that really all you caught?

Haruhi: Huh? You say something?

Kyon: Nope.

**Oh, and feel free to answer the other's questions with them.**

Dria: Ha! I think they already do that, hehe.**  
**  
**Finally: do ANY of you actually know Kyon's name?**

All: NO.

Dria: I do! I do! I do….not, sorry.

* * *

Kyon-Is-Haruhi's-Slave00

**boredness spurred these questions and the reading of this... so here we go.  
**  
**haruhi: if you ever say a certain mysterious character known as john smith *coughkyoncough* again, what would you ask him?  
**Haruhi: " Hey, can I borrow your coat?"

Kyon: What?!

Haruhi: Kyon, don't you know anything? When a mysterious character appears, the fear instilled in the victim always causes the temperature to drop! Don't you watch Murder! Mystery at 11?

Kyon: How did this turn into a murder case?

**itsuki: it seems like you are a child molester or a serial killer merely because of that smile. have you ever considered showing a different face?  
**Itsuki: I'm sorry you feel that way. I'm just always so happy, so I have no real reason to frown.*Smiile*

Yuki: LOLZ

Itsuki: *shocked face*

Dria: Woo-hoo-hoo! Win for you…Kyon-is-haruhi's-slave00…??? Nice name.

**mikuru: has anyone ever asked you to *the following part of the question has been removed due to rating issues* with a toothbrush?  
**Mikuru:*glances at Haruhi*

Haruhi:*shakes head menacingly* Not a word, Mikuru-chan.

Mikuru: N-no, no one has!

**Yuki: at any point during the repetitive summer activities did you consider killing someone just to see if it made a difference?  
**Yuki: Yes.

Kyon: * What?!*

Dria: OMG, I do that too! * slaps five with yuki* Cool. Didn't think she'd do that. ^^

**Kyon: have you ever thought you were a just a character in a weird harem anime?  
**Kyon: You know, I've considered it, but then I watched FLCL….yeah, its beyond me now.

Dria: My boyfriend wants me to dress like Haruna…

Kyon: Uh….right.

Haruhi: OOH! I have an outfit you can borrow!

Dria: Sweet!

Kyon: LALALALA, I CANT HEAR YOU!!!

**so yeah those are questions which will probably never be used in the fic unless for some reason you decide to pay attention to this for some reason**

* * *

c0rndogz

**Hm...Yeah well here I go.**

**Kyon: Remember the intro?And how haruhi was comepletely-*beaten by haruhi fangirls***

Kyon: Yup, it was hilarious. It would have been funny if she'd actually responded.

Mikuru: Haru-chan, I have some new pictures of Taylor Laughtner for you…

Haruhi: LEMME AT EM!!!

Kyon:…so you're on the wolf side, eh?

**Yuki: Have you ever considered writing a novel?**

Yuki: Yes, it is called " _My conscious and I."_ it is about a girl and her companion, a little woman the size of a kitten.

Mikuru: Ulp!

** ME HOW YOU STAY AWESOME.**

Mikuru: That's classified! Teehee!

**Itsuki: Are you KIRAA?**

Dria: Deathnote!!! Woot!

Itsuki: Whats a KIRAA?

Dria: Uh…noob. That answer your question?

**Author: Mudkips.**

**Dria: Yes Shannon, I do like mudkips. Gotta problem with that?!?!?!**

* * *

Dria: Phw…I am soooooo tired after all that. You know what? Hell, im bringin Ryoko and Lil' sis to the party, just for the hell of it!!

Kyon: Dria, don't you think you have enough on your plate?

Dria: no

Kyon: Whatever, that's your fight than.

Dria: Damn straight. Jeez, I've been cuzzing an awful lot….think I should tone it down?

Haruhi: No, it suits you.

Dria: Really? I think it makes me seem---wait. Did haru just give me a compliment? Gods alive, we MUST be tired.

Itsuki: Well, yeah, it's 3 AM and this thing is over 14 pages. *froooooooooooooooooown*

All: OMG!!!!!!!

Dria: Okokokokok, Dria's flipping out here, so we're gonna wrap this up! Next time, we're makin waffles! Yuki, please!

Yuki: Please send us your questions via review, and thank you for your time. We have returned with a vengeance, and your thoughts are appreciated and pndered. Dria, sleep before you collapse.

Dria: ZZZZZ…..No! wait! One last thing! Next issue, I will be bringing MINI RYOKO, TSURUYA, and kyons LIL' SIS! So please feel free to ask them anything! Also, coming up, we will have a genderblending day sometime, so look for it!

THANK YOU! JOIN US NEXT TIME!!!


	6. Announcementsorry!

**********ASK THE SOS BRIGADE ANNOUNCEMENT*****************

Hey, Dria-Kun here! I'd like to apologize about the enlonged delay on Ask Haruhi And The SOS Brigade fan fiction. I have been having some….er….technical difficulties—I've always wanted to say that ^^--- and I have not been able to finish up the next questionnaire session. I do promise it will be posted sometime in the next 1-2 weeks, and this is not the prelude to another year-long disappearance. Promise!

So, to make up for the delay, please send in some rewards you might like in the Ask fiction, and I will be obligated to do it after the next session. Two sessions from now will also be a Gender-blender session. So until then, Merry Christmas, Hanukkah, whatever the hell you celebrate, and stay tuned.

Oh, and if you're wondering where the Brigade is at the moment, well, they're people too. They're sleeping…. Because I slipped them all a date-rape drug. ^^ Happy Holidays!


	7. Q6

_**************************ASK THE SOS BRIGADE!!!!!**************************_

Well, well, well, looks like I'm back on schedule, eh? That's good, huh? You like me don't you? You really like me! I'd like to thank the academy, and the little people, and, and…okay this is boring…

Kyon: Dria… the food?

Dria: AH! That's right! Today, thanks to all you're generous donations/questions, not ONLY was I able to buy a GRAND SLAM BREAKFAST for each charrie, I was ALSO able to bring three very special people to the party! Lil' Sis!

Imouto-chan: Haaaaai! What's up!?

Dria: Tsuruya!

Tsuruya: Heyas! I have fans! I have fans!

Dria: Mini Ryoko!

Ryoko: Who're you callin' MINI!? YUKI?! Where is YUKI?!

Yuki: *picks up Mini Ryoko*

Ryoko: What're you doing? HEY! STOP! Not the knapsaaaaaaaaaaack!!!

Dria: all righty, then. So, on with the inquiries!!

* * *

**BKE**

**This fic is an O.K. one. I was not a member till 3 months after this came out, so i missed it.**

**If i had to ask a few questions to contribute...**

Kyon: Well, I suppose I'm just gonna end up an office worker, you know? I don't really expect to do amazing things so why bother thinking about it?

Kyon: Whats your dream job?

Haruhi: What?! Kyon! Wheres your drive? Your passion?!

Kyon: Probably in the same place your sanity ran off to.

Haruhi: Kyon's gonna be a groupie for me forever!!!!

Kyon: What!?

Haruhi: Too late, I answered, it's soulbound.

Kyon: What is this?! A contract?

**  
Haruhi: Do you consider vampires, werewolves and fantasy things in your searching, or is it just the Scifi tropes?  
**Haruhi: Ppffft! Rediculous! For one, I don't belive vampires would ever go around shouting "bleh, I vant your blud!", much less believe they would ever sparkle!!!!

Yuki: *secret grin*

Itsuki: Well, what about wizards and such?

Imouto-chan: I wanna be a black mage!!!

Itsuki: Boss fight? ( watch fandubbed trailer for proffessor layton and the demon lord's flute)

Haruhi: Yah! Wizards are totally real!

**  
Itsuki:Who do you respect in all the world of Secret Agents the most?  
**Itsuki: One must respect oneself before any other. So I guess I respect myself the most.

Mini Ryoko: Did you just make a crack? Really? That was horrible.

Dria: Go back to nice Ryoko!!!!!!!!!*BAM*

**  
Yuki: Do you actively search for books by the catchiness of the title or the covers? Or do you go by the synopsis?  
**Yuki: Book…

**  
Mikuru: Have you thought about using coffee to keep the brigade active? It has 5x the caffeine. It might help Kyon.**

Kyon: !!!!

Mikuru: Um…have you ever seen Foster's home for Imaginary Friends?

Kyon: WAHOO!!!

Itsuki: Klanoa?

Mikuru: Um….Kyon acts like Mac on Halloween.

Kyon&Itsuki: On top of spagheeeeeeeeeetti! All covered in cheeeeeeeeeeeese!!!!!

* * *

7MukuroRealm7

**Koizumi wins at life. (Unlike Kyon) Okay, for questions...**

Dria: Damn straight he wins at life!!!

**  
Haruhi: Why don't you just make out with Kyon already?**

Haruhi: BECAUSE HE IS A SLOPPY WHORE WHO IS COMPLETELY BORING AND UNNATURALLY NATURAL!!!!!

Kyon: Jeez, why don't you tell us how you feel? Wait, I'm a whore now?

Haruhi: Yes.

Kyon: Even though I'm a guy?

Haruhi: Right.

Dria: Kyon…you can be my whore…

Kyon&Haruhi: NO THANKS!!!

**Kyon: Why don't you just make out with Haruhi already?\**

Kyon: Because, she thinks I'm a whore….she hurt my feelings…

Haruhi: Aw kyon…It's ok…*wraps arms around Kyon*

Kyon: Uh….it is?

Haruhi: Yeah. You have no feelings.

Kyon:*walks away, Haruhi falls to the floor*

Dria&Itsuki: Do you feeeeeel better now, as she faaaaaaaalls to the ground?!

**Kyon: Is it true you scored a home run with Sasaki? (snicker)**

Kyon: I, ah, um….that's classified? *shakes hips a little*

Dria: *groan* something I so didn't need to see….

Mikuru: Um…?

**Mikuru: You're so cute, so why don't you like boys? Are you secretly a lesbian?**

Mikuru: O-of c-course not!!!*blush*

Dria: Dammit…

**Koizumi: What kind of tooth cleaner do you use?**

Itsuki: Arm&hammer plus, and Lusterine laced with bleach and furniture polish.

Kyon: I KNEW IT!!

**Yuki: Why do you have no emotions? Ryoko and Emiri do, so don't you have them to? Or are you one **

**of those people that think emotions are unneeded?**

Yuki: I just don't care.

Dria: Yuki! Rude!

Yuki: Yeah, and?

Dria: Uhhh….

Yuki: LOL

Dria: Oh, god… wait, I mean, oh, Haruhi…

**Yuki: Is it true that you look up hentai on the internet?**

Yuki: I have all the anime, manga games, light novels, figurines, posters, blog entries, character CD's

Haruhi: chara ma chara ma CD…^^;

Dria: Aya-chan!!! EEK!!!*Glomps*

**There we go. I just had to do two questions for Yuki and Kyon. Anyway, I can't wait to see how the brigade reacts to something like this! Until next time,  
Mukuro Out**

* * *

Kyon-is-Hauhi's-Slave00

**mini ryoko: what are the philosophical implications of you coming back to life? (Koizumi i swear to haruhi if you say ANYTHING, i will pull EVERY ONE OF YOUR TEETH OUT OF YOUR BISHONEN MOUTH!)**  
Mini Ryoko: IDK*peers into Itsuki's mouth* Is it possible?

Mikuru: Um…There's no way they'll come out.

Haruhi: Step aside newbies!* Whips out massive pliers*

Dria: Hey! My pliers!

Itsuki: Let's not go overboard now…*sweat*

**Tsuruya: what forms of martial arts are you skilled in?**  
Tsuruya: All of the above!!!!

Mikuru: Um…it's not multiple choice.

Tsuruya: Oh. Thank goodness boys are.( Duh-duh crash!)(Comedy drums)

Mikuru: Tsuruya-chan…

Tsuruya: Aw im kidding…im actually highly trained in the elaborate art of "can of whup-ass" Ohohohohohohhohoho!!!

Haruhi: Me too! * high five*

**Imouto-chan: why do you torment kyon so?**

Imouto-chan: *hugs Kyon tightly* Isn't that what a lil' sis does?

Kyon: At least have some respect and call me big brother.

Imoutou-chan: When you all me by my name.

Kyon: then call me by mine.

Imouto-chan: Mom likes me best!

Kyon: Yeah right!! Who did mom get that new camera for huh?

Imouto-chan: You, but I've used it way more than you have~su

Kyon; You uses my camera!? It was hidden in my room!

Imouto-chan: Yah.*bonks head*

Kyon: You went in my room??!

Dria: OK OK OK!!! That's freakin enough!

* * *

BananasForMonkeys

**Huh... I guess I'll try this.**

**Mini Ryoko: I showed Haruhi-chan to my friend once and she thought you were annoying. What do you plan on doing to my buddy after you've read this?**  
mini Ryoko: Well, first I'll have to kidnap her, then, I'll use a simple lobatamy to remove crucial memories in her no doubt empty mind, and control her as my own body! Ahahahahahaha!!!---ah?!

Yuki:*throws Ryoko across room*

Mini Ryoko: AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!

Dria: Sorry…would've stopped her sooner but its funny when she shakes…she's like a chihuahua…

**Itsuki: When's the last time you've cried? (Tears of joy don't count)  
**Itsuki: Um, well when I was about 10, I fell down and scraped my knee.

Dria; *Staaaare*

Itsuki: Um….yes?

Dria;*staaaare*

Itsuki: you're scaring me…

Dria:*staaaaaaaare*

Itsuki: Stop staring at me! WAAAAAAAH!!!

Dria: there. He cried.

Yuki:*high five*

Dria: Okay, yu-chan, you owe me a senyen. Or a milkshake. Whatever.

**Itsuki again: About how many times a week do you have to fight closed spaces?  
**Itsuki: Well, that depends what week of the month it is, haha.

Kyon: Ok, gross, dude.

Dria: Huh? I don't g---ooooooh!!!

**Itsuki AGAIN: How did you react the first time you went into a closed space? Was that where you met the other espers?**  
Itsuki: I have to say the experience was quite exhilerating, and yes, that is where we discovered our unique powers.

Mini Ryoko: That's kinda vague…

Itsuki: Yeah, I know, hehe *smiiiiile)

**Itsuki for the last time: Has the orginisation ever done something bad to you as punishment for breaking any rules?**  
Itsuki: Hmmm, well, I've been sat in a corner once hahahaha

Mini Tsuruya: Really? Seriously you need like, new material. Somebody! Joke book! Over here!

**(Sorry for asking so many questions, by the way. I'm obbsessed with Koizumi! Trust me, I've got a lot more where that came from!)**

* * *

Zeek72

**For Haruhi:  
1. What would you do if you found out John Smiths sister, the girl he was carrying on his back when you met him, went to the same school as you?**

Haruhi: No way! she was way too young! That'd be so cool though I would totally investigate her!

Kyon: Great way to make friends…

Haruhi:*suspicious glance*

Kyon:What?

Haruhi:Huh? Nothing!!

**2. What would you do to Kyon if he knew about a 300 year old object ,that looks like a machine part belongeding to an advanced civilization, was found buried on Tsuruya's family property but didn't tell you about it?**

Haruhi:*angry face* What?

Kyon: Thank you. You have single handedly shortened my life span.

Haruhi:KYON!! **

Kyon: HALP!!!!!

Tsuruya: My yard? What?

**3. In the manga 'The Vanishing of Nagato Yuki-chan' you only appear in the last 4 or 5 panels of the first chapter with no lines and don't appear in the next couple of chapters. How do you feel about that?**

Haruhi: I;m in a book!?

Dria: Uh…guys, they think they're real people. They don't know about the anime or manga or novels…or figurines…or backboards….cosplay…tote bags…*drool*

Kyon: Ok, Nagato.

**4. There's a group normally refereed to as the Anti SOS Brigade. If you came across them would you try to destroy them or find some way to get them to join the SOS Brigade? Should note that there are a few members with some similarities to those in the SOS brigade.**

Haruhi: I would seek them out and annhialate them! There can only be one Brigade leader in the world! And I am the ultra-leader!! No smarmy "Anti-leader" can beat that! Hohohohoh!

Dria: ….character CDs….

**5. If you found out the student council president was actually an actor hired to play your enemy how would you react?**

Haruhi: Well, not too surprised really. That girl was way too fake, anyhow.

Mini Ryoko: Grrrr…..

Haruhi: Besides, only my enemy would hire someone to act as my enemy, so obviously that makes both of them my true enemy and I do not allow enemies to threaten my brigade!!!

Mini Ryoko: I'll kill her.

Yuki: Quiet. She'll see you.*shoves Mini into backpack*

Mini Ryoko:MMMFF!!

**6. If a rumor started saying that Yuki got rid of Ryoko because she attempted to kill Kyon and was the one to alter the schools records to say she went to Canada how would you react?**  
Haruhi: Then I'd simply tell them to shut up. What a stupid question…

Kyon:*shakes a little*

Mini Ryoko: Heh…*glares at Kyon*

Kyon: *oh god, please stop…*

**For Yuki:  
Since you seem so knowledgeable, and I can guess a likely answer from one of the brigade members, what would happen if a time travelers TPDD (their time traveling device) was removed from their body? Also, how would some one go about doing that? If possible use Mikuru as an example.**  
Yuki: They would die from internal bleeding if not cryonically anesthetized first.

Mikuru: Eep!!!

Kyon: So what tools would they use, an ice pick? Hahahaha

Mikuru&Yuki: …

Kyon: Hey, I was just kidding…guys?

**For Kyon:  
1. Do you ever have nightmares about Ryoko returning to finish what she started?**

Kyon: Yes…*shudder*

**2. Who do you think has a better chance of finding a slider first, you, Yuki, Koizumi or Haruhi?**

Haruhi: ME!!!

Itsuki: Kyon. He seems to have a knack for these things.*smiile*

Kyon: That's creepy, but kinda true.

Mikuru: Yes, oh it's got to be Kyon!

Kyon: Jeez, what am I Bella swan now?

Dria: Twiiiiliiiiiiiight….

**3. How long did it take you to learn how to read Yuki's emotions when she shows them?**

Kyon: Surprizingly, not long. it was such a big change frm like, statue mode.

Yuki: LOL

**For Koizumi:  
It's been mentioned that your 'employers' have to keep Tsuruya out of any thing related to their work. Why is that?**

Kyon: She's a NUTCASE!

Tsuruya: Hey! That was Koizumi's question! Koizumi?

Itsuki: *smiiiiiile* not tellin'.

**For Ryoko:  
's your opinion on the stories that pair you together with Yuki?**

Mini Ryoko: Its despicable! Not like that would even work cuz im so tiny!!

Kyon; What, have you thought this out/

Mini Ryoko: NO!!!

**2. In 'The Vanishing of Nagato Yuki-chan' you're friends with Kyon and try to get Yuki to be more sociable. Does this upset you in any way?**

Mini Ryoko: No. It was all part of my disguise! now that i can't really be seen though, i don't give a damn!!!!!

Dria: Jeez...im gonna kill her again i swear she's so friggin' annoying. Yuki..

Yuki:*shoves mini into back pack*

Mini ryoko: MMMFFF! HEY!!

* * *

_CocoxLadybat is gonna be next so watch out if you submitted after her!!!_

Dria: Whoo…Just as much as last time, eh?

Kyon: Yeah, and you had a lot more characters on your hands this time.

Dria: Uh, yeah, so? I handled it ok, right kyon –kun? I mean, since I have you here, anyhow. You are a big help to me, you know that? Just don't tell my boyfriend, haha, he's the jealousy type. Teehee.

Kyon: Uhm, sure. Thanks.

Haruhi: Jeez…what a kiss-ass…

Dria: You bitch!!!

Yuki: thank you for your submissions, and please leave your questions via reveiw. You thoughts are highly appreciated and pondered. Ja ne, till next time.


	8. Actually Q6 heheh

_**************************ASK THE SOS BRIGADE!!!!!**************************_

Hey! I'm BAAAA-AAAAAACK!!! And guess what? Today is the official SUPER UBER MEGA EPIC AWSOME AMAZING DRIA-KUN'S REWARD TO THANK YOU FOR BEING SO PATIENT WITH HER SLOW ASS DAY!!!! And as such a day, I am obliged to fulfill the request of your comments…

You readers have filthy little minds.

But I like that. ^^

So the unanimous vote was cast and earlier I slipped Kyon and Haruhi some of my seemingly endless supply of date-rape drugsand removed all of their clothing. They are nekkid and…Oh…they're just waking up.

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Haruhi: AAAAA!!! What the hell!?!?! *Pulls covers over chest*

Kyon: *sort of stares*

Haruhi: EEK?! Wa-wa-wa-what did you---

Kyon: What did I do!? What's that supposed to mean!?

Haruhi: You pervert! This is disgusting!!

Kyon: Says the girl who changes in front of the entire class everyday…

Haruhi:What was that!?!?

Kyon: nothing. Hey! Can we at least have some clothes?

Dria: sorry, you two are gonna have to answer this session. In. The. Nude.

Kyon: wonderful.

Haruhi: Ohhhh….*pulls covers over head and a little more of Kyon shows.

Dria:*BLUSH!* O-ok, on with the Questins!!!

* * *

CocoxLadybat

**Michie and Mamo: Lesh do this!  
Michie's Q's:**

**Itsuki: (You rock!) How do ya' feel about Mikuru-Tan?**

Itsuki: well, she's an amazing friend and colleague. I have high regards of her because she is quite valuable to me. *smiiile*

Kyon: *whats that smug grin about you bastard!?*

**Mikuru: I will release the dogs if you don't tell me who you like! Gr...**

Mikuru: Ah-i-um…PUPPIES!! I love them I love them I love them!! Eh, heh?

Haruhi,Kyon,Dria:*Simply stares at amazing display of Moeh*

**Haruhi: What if I told you I was your evil twin? O_o**

Haruhi: I knew it! That makes so much sense!

Kyon: *what makes sense?*

Haruhi: Of course! That's why my parents only get me like, two presents at Christmas!

Kyon: Wait, you still believe in Santa Clause?

Haruhi: Huh? What are you talking about? Santa's a slider, right?

Dria:*Note! Children in Japan only receive presents until they stop believing in Santa!*

**Kyon: Can you ask Haru-tan out? Right nao? C'mon! You knows ya wanna!**

Kyon: No. I can't, nor do I want to ask her out. Rememver the evil twin question? Yeah, my bet is that Haruhi's actually the evil one.

Haruhi: Ass…

Kyon: …

**Yuki: Can you play DDR?**

Yuki:*Cartoon Heroes plays in background* *Perfect, perfect, perfect, great, perfect, Marry me, perfect, great, perfect, perfect, perfect, miss, perfect, perfect!*- ^ - V Woot!

Itsuki: Me next!

**Mikuru: I think my brother broke your TPDD. How do you feel bout that?  
**Mikuru: B-but its in-inside of m-me!!! How would y-you----OH!!!*BLUSH!*

Dria: Oooh…I get to break it next!!!

**Mamoru's Q's:  
**  
**Haruhi: Remember that one dream you had about the blue giants and Kyon kissing you?**

Haruhi: NO!!! IT WAS HOT THAT DAY I WORE A PONYTAIL!!!

Dria: How do you know what day they mean?

Haruhi: Huh?!

Dria: He didn't say anything about the ponytail…*snicker*

Haruhi: I-I don't know what you're talking about….

**Kyon: What would you do if you could go back in time again and prevented Haruhi from recreating the world?**

Kyon: I….i really don't know… I really like the world I live in now. I think I could put up with her crazy antics for a little while longer if I got to live here.

Itsuki: Beautiful words.

Kyon: Thanks. Sorry Asahina.

Mikuru: That's okay. Maybe someday the barrier will lift up and we can go further back. *smile*

Yuki: Whatever. It's good for me if it stays the same.

Dria:*Staaaaaaare*

Kyon; Nagato just said "Whatever."

Dria: What have I done to her?!

**Itsuki: what would happen if Kyon did that?  
**Itsuki: Well, I would not be here, would I?

Dria: hee hee, he's gotcha there.

**Mamoru: that's it.  
Michiru: yeppers.  
Momoru: Lets go eat lunch.  
Michiru: Okies, bro.**

Dria: OOH! I want a Whataburger!!! Please? Hello? GUYS?!

* * *

ChaosxPaladin

**... I'm bored, why not?**

**Kyon: What would you do if you woke up in the morning with Haruhi clinging on to you in your bed as if you guys had it going the night before, and this turned out to be one of Haruhi's wishes? (*PS: cover her ears please. I have enough troubles on my hands.)**  
Kyon: simple. I'd run. Far, far away.

Dria: *snicker* we'll see….

Kyon: *what did she say!?*

**Itsuki: Do you sparkle whenever you smile, just like how Edward Cullen Sparkles whenever he is in the sunlight**?  
Itsuki: Why yes, yes I do.

Kyon: Oh, gee, don't be so modest Koizumi.

Itsuki: I wasn't. A smile is the universal sign of friendship. I'm quite proud of it.*Smiiiiiile*

Haruhi: see?! This is why Twilight ruins everything!! Now Koizumi's all broken! Like Meta-…knight.

Dria:*wearing a Team Jacob shirt and holding copy of Eclipse* W-what?!

**Haruhi: When is your next Rock concert gonna be? Damn, I swear I had an ** when I heard you sing God knows and Lost my music! Absolutely amazing**!  
Haruhi: *swings air Guitar* Woohoo! You're so right! Unknown welcome unknown! Koi koi welcome unknown! Egao wa Pikari!

Dria: Mukizu no sunshine!

Haruhi: Are are…

Dria: Tetsaguri wa!

Haruhi: Tstukimui tara

Dria&haruhi: 1,2,3!!!

Dria: Ponya ponya

Haruhi: Kawaiikute, Dakishimetei kokoro wa

Dria: Challenger!!!! I love that song!

Haruhi: Me too! *high five*

**Mikuru: I heard a rumor that in your spare time at home you get drunk and throw temper tantrums!** **Is that true??! Does our beloved Mikuru have hatred and despair under that cute, undeniably adorable face??!!**  
Tsuruya: Ohohohohohohohoh!! That was awsome! I remember that!!

Mikuru: W-what? I n-never—

Haruhi: Omygawsh! That was so much fun! She made the cutest faces!!

Mikuru: When d-did I ever---

Haruhi&Tsuruya: Squeeeeee!!!!

**Nagato: Are you video games?? The Yian-Kut-Ku in Monster Hunter keeps kicking my **!!**

Yuki: No, I am not video games.

Dria: Uh, I think he means "into" games.

Yuki: Oh. Then yes. And I am sorry that you're a** is frequently kicked.

* * *

facexorxvalue

**Congrats Dria-kun! Your getting so much feed back! I cant express how happy I am now that your back! Yayz! :D**

**Kyon: Aw... No date? You do know that as a fangirl I will get what I want. Just you wait. JUST. YOU. WAIT.**  
Kyon: Ok, I'll bad you cant find us in the mountains. Dria where are we? The Alps right?

Dria: Try the mountainais area of Austin, Texas.

Kyon: Wait…

**Mikuru: If you were allowed to make Haruhi cosplay, what would you make her wear? Something that SHE might find embarassing? Or has she no shame?**  
Mikuru: Heehee, she probably wouldn't care as long as kyon-kun didn't see.

Haruhi: Whats that supposed to mean!?

Mikuru: Well, she has the attitude, so I guess Asuka from Evangelion. The dress would look cute on her.*smile* Or maybe misty from pokemon…or the Vespa girl from FLCL….

Haruhi: You like red hair, huh?

Mikuru: Ah!

Dria: Ooooh! Miku has a fetish! C'mere let me introduce you to my pavorite pair of twins…George and Fred Weasely, and Hikaru and Koaru…

**Yuki: ...Any tips on how to make a really good dating sim?**  
Yuki: Get some experience, LOL

Haruhi: She's totally right. I bet I could make a really good one!!

Kyon:*Didn't you dump every single guy though!?*

**Koizumi: Ever consider modeling?**  
Haruhi: Ahohohohoho!!

Kyon:*pushes Itsuki* Run, man! RUN!

Itsuki: Aw…but it sounds like fun….

**Haruhi: I cant date Kyon? Why not? Are you being overly possesive? (Stupid god.. always takes my guy...) Even if I pay you, or we make a trade? I own a sock store in Texas that has a bunch of cool things (*cough*junk*cough*) in it.**

Haruhi: What?! Of course I'm possessive! He was my subordinate FIRST! I will fight tooth and nail to keep my minions! To the death for Mikuru! Never surrender! Never!

Kyon: Haruhi, it's an offer not a challenge…wait did she say Texas?!!

Dria: EEEE! Whats it called?! I love Junk shops!!!

* * *

c0rndogz

**Ohman, I feel so loved to actually be responded to in a question...thing...whatever! more questions!  
**Dria: Oh, C0rndogz, I love you so. ^^

**Itsuki: Have you ever considered having a relationship with Haruhi?**

Itsuki: Not on my life.*SMIILE* Though she is quite beautiful.

Dria: Goddammit Itsuki, your answers are always so short. I can't do a thing with you.

Itsuki: I…I'm sorry.

Dria: SEE?! You SEE what I mean!?

**Kyon: I seriously want to know how you survive getting dragged around by your tie all day. Don't you get chocked to death?**

Kyon: Well, I'm not dead yet! Yet, stressing the "yet," Haruhi.

Haruhi: What, you expect me to grab your hand?

Kyon: It would be an improvement, yes.

Haruhi: Pervert.

Kyon.: Uh-huh, and you keep pulling those blankets off of me whyyyyyyy??

Haruhi: BECAUSE! You are a guy! Girls should be modest and….and…uh…

DRia:Hee hee

**Haruhi: There's this rumor that you and kyon are dating. Any comments?**

Haruhi: I would never ever ever date a subordinate! EVER EVER EVER---

Kyon: Hey Haruhi, go out with me.

Everybody: WHAAAAAAAT?!?!?!

Haruhi: O—ok….

Kyon: Phsych!

Haruhi*fuming* I am gonna kick your---

Kyon: Good luck doing that without revealing us.

Haruhi: Grrrrrrr!!!!

Yuki: Hehehe, fail.

**Mikuru: Really, are you in love?**

Mikuru; Hee! I'll never tell!

Kyon: *oh please for the love of God tell me!!!*

* * *

Juko the Creampuff

**Okay Dria I have a question for you. How would you compare yourself to the sos brigade (besides you and Mikuru's moles with an actual shape)?**

Dria: *mouth drop*

Mikuru: W-what? H-he knows a-about the…?

Dria: Yes mikuru….he knows. Ladies and gentlemen, I have a stalker. Just kidding. This is my handsome, amazing… and very uncouth boyfriend. And, baby, if I have to answer… Im as crazy as Haruhi, smiley as Koizumi, dorky as Mikuru, and plain as Kyon. And I'm a bibliophile so there's Yuki. Happy? I loooove youuuuuuuu!

**Question for Kyon: why do you put up with haruhi? You can easily just say no and leave at that.**

Kyon: Well, I would if there wasn't the whole…you know…. It's my job to keep her happy so she doesn't desroy the world thing…

**Question for Itsuki: I notice that you actually frown on rare occasions. Why would you not frown at some of these questions?**

Itsuki: Well, I'm just so happy that anybody would include me in something this special.

Dria: You mean "successful", right?

Itsuki: By the way, I'm honored to meet the boyfriend of Dria. How do you do?

Dria: Ok you Yaoi target, back off! He's mine!! Kyon! Tell him you love him again!

Kyon: Hell no.

**Question for Mikuru: Why is everything you know classified, and do not say thats classified.**

Mikuru: Cuz.

**Question for Haruhi: How would you say your relation with itsuki is?**

Haruhi: Well, he's a great friend and an amazing actor!

Itsuki: Aw, thank you. *smiiiile*

Dria: Haruhi, I swear to Haruhi if you start him smiling again, I will personally punch your face in.

**(you dont have to answer this) would any of you date my buddy chris**?

ALL GIRLS: NO!

* * *

IHKF

**Hi, I love this so far! I keep falling out my chair laughing so hard! ROMFL is in order? Oh well. I've got a few questions, myself! ^^  
**Dria: Ah, a ROMFL you say, the highest of the highest of regards!? I accept! I do!

**Haruhi: What first made you interested in the paranormal? And how are you not in jail with all that you do to poor Mikuru? LOL  
**Haruhi: Aww, what I do to Mikuru-chan isn't THAT bad! Hey Mikuru! Get under the covers with me!

Mikuru: Ehh…..*Sweat*

Dria: NO! No Yuri on my….actually nevermind. Mikuru is just too moeh…

**Kyon: I see you keep getting interupted when you're about to say your name. Why is it that you hate 'Kyon?'  
**Because it's a play on the word tae KWON do and my real name!!! It's ridiculous…

Dria: Um…That's really not that bad…I've had worse.

Kyon: Doubt it.

Dria: My last name's Puckett. Imagine the variations.

Kyon: ….Wow.

Dria: Yeah.

Kyon: I'm so sorry—

Dria: Yeah. It's fine.

**Mikuru: Why are you so darn shy? Do you have self confidence issues? Something you get from your parents?  
**Haruhi: Naw she's just got too great a figure so if she was outgoing, boys would be bombarding her everywhere she went!

Dria: Haruhi! Let Mi-chan speak!

Mikuru: Um.. that's exactly what I was going to say…

Dria: Dang. You know she's hot if even she doesn't deny it!

**Yuki: Would you let Haruhi re-create the world just to get unlimited books to read?  
**Yuki: Ah…um…huh….

Kyon:*oh no… Yuki actually in shock…this is bad*

**Those are all of my questions! I hope I didn't accidently repeat anybody else's...keep up the good work!**

* * *

AI spy (Alien Interface Spy)

**I have questions for the SOS brigade**

to Haruhi Suzumiya  
haven't you thought that John Smith ,the guy you met 3 years ago and Kyon might be the same person?  
Haruhi: No way? Why would I? I mean, John Smith was way taller than Kyon. And cuter…

Dria: What if an older version of Kyon time traveled to see you?

Haruhi: Yeah right. Impossible.

Dria: I thought…

Haruhi: As if Kyon was cool enough to ever get access to that kind of technological breakthrough.

Kyon: * Hey…*

**to Kyon**  
**Why don't you tell Brigade member,what is inside the computer file with the name of mikuru that you don't want any one to see?  
**Mikuru:Yeah! Please tell me!

Kyon: Uh….

Haruhi: Huh? Theres a Mikuru file?

Kyon: No.

Mikuru: But I saw it!! What is it?!

Dria: A band.

Kyon: A…uh, yeah a band!

Mikuru: Named Mikuru?

Kyon: Yes.

Mikuru: Oh! We should listen to it!

Kyon:*failure!*

Dria:*Hehehehe*

**  
to Itsuki  
have you done a special training to control your esper powers?  
**Itsuki: But of course!

Dria: Jeez, enough with the short to-the-point answers!!

Itsuki: Isn't that what they want?

Dria: No! You're the Bishie! They want a tease!

Itsuki: Ah…um, well…That's classified? Heheheh…

Dria: Just forget it Itsuki. You've ruined it.

Itsuki: Oh…*Tear*

Dria:*sigh* Come on…I'll buy you a coffee…

Itsuki: *sniff* okay.

*HAHAHAHA!!! I got the bishie I got the bishie!!*

**to Yuki  
why don't you try to cosplay with asahina mikuru and suzumiya haruhi?**

Yuki: I do…

Mikuru: Ulp!

Kyon: Haha, they sure like to one up each other…

MIKURU: *GOTH LOLI STYLE PURPLE PLAID MINI SKIRT MAID*

YUKI:* GLASSES GIRL IN QUEEN OF HEARTS OUTFIT*

DRIA: um…* Simple black Seifuku* I lost, didn't I…

Haruhi: I'm cold…

Dria: Sorry Haru, I took your place since you and Kyon gotta be naked.

Haruhi: You are Satan.

Dria: And You are God.

Kyon:* and mikuru is an angel* *Love sigh*

**to Mikuru Asahina  
what is your relationship with Kyon,except for being a good friend?  
**Mikuru: Um, Well I suppose he's a valuable necessity for the work I conduct on this time pl—I mean here. He's very kind!

Kyon: Oh, thank you, Asahina-san. That makes me so happy.*Moves toward Mi-chan**covers slip a little*

Haruhi: You are naked. Stay away from her.

Dria:*Chewing popcorn* No no! Keep going!

**  
to Imoutou chan  
who do you are the best matches for Kyon? mikuru asahina, yuki nagato or Haruhi Suzumiya?  
**Imotou-Chan: Myuuu…

Dria: Baby, wake up… it's your turn…

Imotou: Nome… Nee-chan, marry Mikuru.

Kyon:* Have I ever told you that you are my favorite sister?!*

Imotou: mmm….zzzz

**please answered my questions**

Dria: Done an' done! What do I win???

* * *

Kaos and Magnus

**Dria: Oh-oh…..**

**We are glad you have used our questions, so, here are the next row, with a little twist, for this time it will be an OC making the questions!  
**  
**Now with you: Ankiseth, The Ancient One!  
**  
**Ankiseth: This is a masterpiece of artwork!, I'm so honoured to be summoned to mess... I mean, to say my two words in your wonderful work. Now, I'm aware of some coincides with your world and another world I have visited too often, the world of Evangelion!, and I want your opinion on these coincidences  
**Dria: I know!!! It's totally insane!!! And thank you ^^

**To Yuki: My most precious and beautiful extraterrestrial girl, I've can't help but to wonder how much Ayanami DNA the I. D. T. E. stole to create such perfection as you... so tell me, how much of that little Angel is in you?  
**Yuki: None. I'm not even partially human.

**To Kyon: During all your adventures you have shown certain traits that reminds me of certain boy that always got pushed around by a feisty girl, also he had his two stooges that were for no good, pretty much like yourself, so, in an attempt to clear my doubts, can you try to play this beautiful cello? (hands over a cello to Kyon), maybe certain girls here will find it romantic, or at least you can calm your growing stress, don't worry if you have never played it before, just try  
**Kyon: Uh…ok…*SNAP!!* uh…the stick thingie broke…

Dria: AH! *in pain* It's too close to my violin….urg….

Kyon: Um…Three of the strings snapped off…

Dria: AGH!!! I can't take it!! *Throws Cello at Ankiseth* And those are heavy too!!!!!

**To Koizumi: You are one who can't lie to me, Tabris, you are just as unmistakable as an Uzumaki, and the way you act around Kyon just blow your cover even more, still, this time you seems to only have a happy life, or not?  
**Dria: OMG!! Itsuki is Koaru!! EEK! I love it I love it!!

Itsuki: Ha ha ha. Interesting. *smiiiiiiile*

Kyon:* He laughed. He didn't deny it!!!!*

**To Haruhi: Ah!, the feisty one!, how many laughs I had by watching your goes and comings!, tell me, don't you feel like trying some german beer?, or maybe pushing around some meek boy just for the seek of amusement?, or maybe getting jealous of blue haired girls?, do you like the red colour?**

Haruhi: Ich libi Dich!

Dria: Aw, I love you too!

**To Mikuru: The precious Mikuru-chan, I had a hard time figuring it with you, but finally you remembered me of certain beautiful girl that felt so attracted to her sempai, such a beautiful heart, and so delicious body, I can't help but to wonder if you are related to her...  
**Dria: Um…wasn't that asuka too? No no no, She's Maya Ibuki, the Lieutenant at NERV! She always follows hard ass Ritsuko around! She's beautiful, young-looking and…ah…sorry.

Mikuru: No, you're so right! Look at this! The part where Ritsuko outdoes her on the computer typing! That was such a clumsy moment it's so like me!

Dria: Moeh is Moeh. *nod*

**To all: I do wonder sometimes, if little Shinji dreamed about a world like this once, with him being more manly yet still being pushed around, with his feisty girl still being bossing him around yet somehow attracted to him, with his Ayanami angel now capable of saving his skin when needed, with that pretty flower not for him for the "Age" difference and yet now caring for him so much, and his barely only male true friend still drooling for him... I do wonder if this is just a coincidence... or an effect of third impact, maybe our beloved Yuki knows, or perhaps is Mikuru-chan who holds the answer, I mean, isn't it suspicious that certain date is no longer reachable?**

Kyon: Or maybe Asuka was actually a god in disguise and when she got offed she didn't wanna die and made a brand new world. How's that.*Looks extremely unsure*

Dria: *nods at Mikuru.* I think we can teach him, mi-chan.

Mikuru: Yes, it's quite possible…^^  
Kyon: * since when is Asahina an otaku!?*

**Magnus: Now, now Ankiseth, is enough of messing around with them, now, I managed to bring this little box of "toys", I would like if you everyone of you chose one and plays with them as good children (Hands over a big box with the words "Moira Brown" on it, the box contains a "Rock-it-Launcher", a "Railway spike Rifle", a "sheshkebab", and the other custom weapon from Fallout 3), Have fun!  
**All: Oooooh….

Dria: Thank yooooooou Santa!

**Kaos: I have a question!, Koizumi, if you can chose to give a kiss on te lips to someone, who will you chose?, Kyon or Haruhi?  
**Itsuki: Ahahaha. Interesting question.*Smiiiiile*

Dria: Finally! A little tease! You have it!!!

Itsuki: Ah, so I have. Heh, extraordinary…

Dria: So who would you kiss?

Itsuki: Hmm…Let me get back to you on that.

Dria:*Anime shocku*

**  
Magnus: KAOS!, ahem, once again sorry, and thanks for your time**

* * *

DelinquentDuo**  
**  
**Yuki: Despite the fact that you're both agents from the Integrated Data Thought Entity, Ryoko seems to be a little more energetic. Why is this?  
**Mini-Ryoko: Because I have a purpose!!!!

Yuki: What?

Mini: To get back at YOU!!!

Yuki: *shoves Mini into duffle bag*

Mini: MMMRF!!!

**Haruhi/Kyon/Yuki/Mikuru/Koizumi: What do you want for Christmas?**

Haruhi: I want an actual client! All we had was that stupid missing person job…

Kyon: Yeah, whatever. You were so into that…I want a new bike.

Dria: Again? Heheheh…

Yuki: Book.

Mikuru: I'd like a new dress… maybe in blue…

Haruhi: Yes! Why didn't I think of it before? Police babe!!!

Mikuru: Eh?! No! like a party dress!

Haruhi: Yay! Yay!

Ituki: Hahaha, I would just love for my friends to be happy and well…

All: Awww….PUT A SOCK IN IT!

Dria:*whisper* I still love you Itsuki!*Muwa!*

* * *

HaruhixKyon

**Okay, okay, OKAY.  
I have some questions for you. Since I'm eagerly awaiting an update.**

**  
Haruhi & Kyon: How do you feel about my username?**

Haruhi&Kyon?: Its stupid.

Dria: AGH! Guys! Rude much!? Sorry!!

**Itsuki: ARE YOU CAPABLE OF GETTING PREGNANT?!?!?!**

ITsuki: Yes.

All: WHAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!

Itsuki: Hehehe… was that good Dria-san?

Dria: Oh, sure. A heart attack would just make my day!

**Mikuru: So, we all know you're faking the whole 'cute, innocent' thing. Which brings me to ask: Are you really a good actress, player, and general toyer-of-the-hearts-of-men-er?**

Mikuru: Ah…i…ah…ah…ah…CHUN!!!*sneeze*

Kyon: Does that answer your question?

**Yuki: We all knew this was coming: You read ALOT of books, right? Eventually, you would have had to come across a series by the name of "Twilight" that many people either love or hate. So...  
Edward or Jacob?  
Just kidding, Yuki! ^^ This is more of a crackish, prank call question than anything. BUT YOU STILL MUST ANSWER! Rawr.**

Yuki: …Carlisle.

Dria: Ahahahahaha!!! Yeah!

**Author: Ever watch all almost ten minutes of Mudkip Insanity on YouTube? Oh, and thanks for writing one of the best interview/full of crack fics I've read in awhile.**

**-HaruhixKyon**

Dria: Thank you and…mudkips? Oh…oh no…

* * *

Dria: Awright~~Su! That was a fun one!

Kyon: Can we have our clothes back?

Dria; *hands Haruhi her clothes*

Kyon: What about me?!?

Dria:…. Itsuki, take off your clothes and give 'em to kyon.

Itsuki: Ok, sure.*strip strip*

Dria: Ah, I love the smell of nudity in the evening. Yuki-cha! Take us out!

Yuki: Thank you for your time and questions. Please leave any new questions or comments via review. Your thoughts are appreciated and pondered. Until next time, this is Nagato, signing off. ROFL.


	9. uhhrandom

******ASK THE BRIGADE FAN INVASION BOREDOM DAY!!!!*********

Ok, ok, I know, you got all excited when you saw the alert, and you rushed right over to check out what mischeif Dria and the Brigade are etting themselves into today….unfortunately I'm having a bout of writer's block and I needed a break… That's when I saw that **Ask Haruhi and the SOS Brigade** has nearly four thousand hits.

I'm thinking, wow, there's no way. So, since I am sick as a dog…man that phrase makes no sense, why are dogs supposed to be so sick---- ah, I mean, since im not feeling well, I decided to sprinkle out a few new things starting today. Don't worry, next session will be (hopefully) a Questin Session, but today, I though I would start my Forced Fan Invasion with none other than **7MukuroRealm7 **soley because I liked his profile. Ok, well, let's get started I suppose.

**Personal Motto: If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.**

Dria: I always say, if at first you don't succeed, throw lemons at life.

**Here's something to think about. Humans only use 10 of their brains capacity at MAX. Where do you think the other 90 goes?**

Dria: Actually, human ADULTS only use about 8%, and Teens are dumbed down at 2-4%. The interesting thing? An average adult on drugs uses 12-16%... you can take this anyway you like.

**Words of wisdom: when life gives you a lemon, chuck it right back and add some more for good measure.**

Dria: When life gives me lemons, I make orange juice, then sit back and let everyone wonder how I did it. Or I chuck 'em at life if at first I don't succeed… Koizumi could use a good lemon beating…

**More words of wisdom: Smile. It makes people think you won't hurt them.**

Dria: It also makes them think you will… until you get your braces off, that is.

**Here's something interesting to think of: In the genderbending of haruhi suzumiya, Itsuko Koizumi is depicted as a Homosexual, and if she is based off the original, that means that Koizumi is a homosexual.**

Dria: NOOOOOOOOOO!!! I mean, I expected it but…..nooooo!!!!

Well…interesting…I guess I'll do another ^^


	10. Q7 YAY!

******ASK THE SOS BRIGADE!*********

***Disclaimer, since ppl have been buggin me...Haruhi owns me, i don't own her....yet.*******

Ta-Dah! Guess 'em ups! I'm so so so so sorry, but i forgot to remind you guys that this session was to be a gender-bender issue! Aww...and i wanted to see Mitsuro with a tiny face and a big package... Well here is the Official Announcement!!! CHAPTER 12 WILL BE A GENDER BENDER!!!!!! Why chapter twelve? Cuz i want to do another Fan invasion. So, if you think you have an interesting profile, or want a chat with me to go on the Fiction, send me a PM(Private message Kessie) instead of a review. Well, then---

Haruhi: Enough with the self-promotion you moron.  
Dria: B-but we're getting so popular!  
Haruhi: No, you are letting it get to your head, and forgetting to feed us.  
Dria: And you are letting PMS take control.  
Haruhi: *dot Dot dot* So you were announcing our new mascot?  
Dria: Oh yeah! A lemon!  
koizumi: Still think i could use a good lemon beating?  
Dria: Oh, i know you could use a good lemon beating.*giggle* now take off your clothes.  
Yuki:*nod*

* * *

**leonazo**

**OK. It's my turn to ask some questions... MUAHAHAHAHA!!**

**-Itsuki-  
1) You once said there's a lot of people with theory's about Suzumiya Haruhi. Why do you think YOURS is the correct one?  
**Itsuki: I doubt i will ever truly know if our theory is correct. Perhaps Suzumiya is just as much of a super utility in the supernatural sense as she is in everyday life, and every theory about her is a correct one.  
Kyon: That makes a lot of sense.  
ITsuki: I know, i sounded so smart right there, didn't I?  
Dria: Yeah....uh here...*tosses cookie to Itsuki*

**2) Just a Hypothetical situation. Instead of Kyon, it's YOU who are the key. Now, would you act the same? What will you do that Kyon does not?  
**Itsuki: Well, i would simply try to keep her happy by any means possible, as i always do. The only difference would be that i would be doing all the grunt work instead of being a secondary source.  
Kyon: Uh...what's that supposed to mean?

**3) Haruhi gets a Death Note. How will she react?  
**Itsuki: Uh.... Well, i suppose she wouldn't actually know what it did...but i would definitely try to get it away from her as soon as possible.  
Mini Ryoko: And give it to me.  
Itsuki: No.

**-Kyon-  
1) If you had to choose a couple between the brigade's members, and, (Just Imagine) you could make a combination of the best attributes. Who and which attributes would you choose? (Example: Yuki's body, Itsuki's brain, Haruhi's personality)  
**Kyon: Hahaha, there's no way i'd choose "Yuki's Body" too many pervy and homo jokes.  
Dria: *smile fades as hope for jokes vanish*  
Kyon: I'd choose...Mikuru's charm...  
Mikuru: Ah! thank you!  
Kyon: And Haruhi's persistant, never-give-up-hope attitude.  
Haruhi: Really?  
Kyon: Yeah.  
Haruhi: You sure do need it you ol' killjoy.  
Kyon: ...

**2) Were would you like to travel to?  
**Kyon: Nowhere really. I mean, don't get me wrong, i dont want to stay in that hell-hole town, but it seems too much trouble to travel.  
Tsuruya: Is it because the last time you traveled, you were drugged and taken to Austin, TexAS?  
Kyon: Uh, maybe... What about you? Weren't you drugged too?  
Tsuruya: Hohohohoho! No,No,No!~wai! I came here on my own free will.  
Kyon: You're kidding.  
Tsuruya:Nope.

**3) Haruhi gets a Death Note. How will she react?  
**Kyon: This again? Uh, she begins to utterly ravage the world as she knows it...until she runs out of paper that is.  
Mikuru: Heehee....  
Kyon: What?  
Mikuru: Nothing! it's just, Itsuki was so optimistic, and you kinda make it horrible! I thought it was sorta...cute.  
Kyon:*BLUSH*

**-Yuki-  
1) Your name means Snow (If I'm correct). Why is that?  
**Yuki: Obviously because i was named "yuki" And i was placed in Japan where it's usually common to have a Japanese name.

**2) Which are your favorites novels?  
**Yuki: The Girl Who Jumped Through Time, My StepSister is from the Planet Weird, Darkangel....  
Haruhi: So basically everything, right?  
Yuki: Yes.  
Dria: I love you.

**3) Haruhi gets a Death Note. How will she react?  
**Yuki: IDK, my BFF Jill?

**-Asahina-  
**1) I've been reading some Isaac Asimov stories... Is the future anything like that?  
Mikuru: Oh, it depends on which book, since some have aliens and some dont...  
Kyon: Wait....time traveling aliens?  
Mikuru: Ahahahah! No, no, nothing like that! *Smile*  
Kyon: *nothing like what?*

**2) There's a lot of people fanarting you all the time. People who imagines being with you. People pretty much in love with you. Hell, there's even people who wants to get married with you. What do you think about it?  
**Mikuru: Ah! i'm flattered, but sorry, i'm unavailable...  
Kyon: *That face again...that face again...*

**3) Haruhi gets a Death Note. How will she react?  
**Mikuru: Ah...  
Dria: OK! Enough! What the hell!?!?!  
Mikuru: *Uber fast* She'd-probably-start-a-crime-fighting-brigade-and-i'd-have-to-dress-as-a-sexy-officer!!!!  
Dria: Admit it. You like cosplay.  
Mikuru: Eh...heh?

**-Haruhi-  
1) Which is the best anime/manga/novel you ever watch/read?  
**Haruhi: Lucky Star... It's just so random... and every bit true!  
Dria: Right?~wai! I love the mangaka girl, she's just like me! and Patricia Martin too!  
Haruhi: I know! I _love_ exchange students! i wish stuff like that would happen to me!  
Itsuki: *anime breeze**anime sweatdrop*

**2) Just Hypothetical. Aliens come and say you've got to go with them... Great isn't it? Well... they say you can't take Kyon.  
**Haruhi: Well, whats the problem? I'd just go, right? Say bye to my parents and leave. Whatever.*Semi-hyperventilating*  
Itsuki: Are you allright?  
Haruhi: OF COURSE IM ALLRIGHT!!!!!!!  
Kyon: ...  
Dria: Stop ending with that, now Itsuki's more interesting than you are! Remember the trouble we had with him!?  
Kyon: !!!  
Dria: Eh, it's an improvement.

**3) You got a Death Note. How will you react?  
**Dria: You know... i'm so debating whether i should eat you right now.  
Haruhi: what the hell is a Death Note?  
Itsuki: I told you.  
Kyon: Right, right, like i was gonna doubt the person with freakin' phsycic ability.

**Keep the good work Up!! :)**

**Leon**

**

* * *

**

**SourKatana**

**QUESTIONARE  
KOIZUMI: How would you react if one of your teeth got chipped?  
**Itsuki: Go buy Chiclets...  
Dria: NOOOOOOOOOOOOES!!!!  
Itsuki: I'm only joking.*smiiiiiles*  
Dria: Bastard...

**Haruhi: Okay say that dream you had about Kyon kissing you was real(Not saying it was) and when you asked him about it all he did was blush what would you assume? But if he said that it was true what would you DO to him?  
**Haruhi: *Thinks for a moment**BLUUUUUUSH!!!*

**Kyon: What would you say if you walked in the club room and Mikuru was naked?  
**Kyon: Ah....well....erm...  
Haruhi: Answer the question Kyon.  
Mikuru:*BLUSH!*  
Kyon: Eheh, well i'd just enjoy the veiw, i suppose... ^^  
Dria: Hells to the yeah!  
Mikuru:*BLUSH!*  
Haruhi: I'll kill you!!!!  
Kyon: AGH!!!  
*I'll leave this to your imagination*

**Mikuru: Why don't you lock the door when you change?  
**Haruhi: It's because secretly, she WANTS somebody to see her perfect body!  
Mikuru: *BLush!* No not at all! I actually do lock the door... somebody comes behind and unlocks it!  
SOSdan: *stares at Haruhi*  
Haruhi: What!?

**Haruhi: What would you say if Kyon Died at the hands of Ryoko Asakura?  
**Haruhi: what? But she's in Canada.

**Haruhi: What if you were a GOD?!?!?!?!  
**Haruhi: What do you mean, "If?" I AM a god!  
SOSDan: *Holds Breath*  
Haruhi: Who else is as amazing as i am!? I am totally the coolest!  
Kyon: *there you go with that "totally" freaking us out again*

**Kyon: Why did you keep those Mikuru pics huh?(Implied so Mikuru and Haruhi can hear)  
**Kyon: Wh-what pictures?  
Mikuru: ~Wai? 3

**Haruhi: WHat if Mikuru was a time traveler, Yuki was an Alien, and Koizumi was an ESPer?  
K done good luck with your hentai fantasys of Kyon Haruhi(Make sure she hears that!)  
**Haruhi: HAHAHA! As if to Both! Maybe Itsuki would be cool enough, but Yuki? No way! And Mikuru is so cute, i would never allow it!  
Kyon: I don't think that would be something you could control...*Technically, i'm a time traveler too...**Feels left out*

**..................................................................................................................................................................................................................  
Zeek72**

**I've only got a few questions this time.**

**Kyon:**

**1. What's your opinion on the theory that the reason you're not supposed to get too close to Mikuru is that she's related to you?  
**Kyon: *Drops to floor* !!!!!!!!!!!!  
Mikuru: Um...a-are you allright?  
Kyon: !!!!  
Haruhi: Aw, he's fine.

**2. How's it feel to watch your self get stabbed and know you had to let it happen?  
**Kyon: I would do anything to protect the ones I love.  
Haruhi: Yeah, if it didn't involve any work. All you had to do was sit there and get stabbed....and how was that protecting the ones you love?  
Kyon: I...I just wanted to sound cool.  
Dria: Competition with Itsuki gettin' to ya?  
Kyon: Damn smiley bastard...

**Yuki:Shortly after you re-created the world Kyon confronts you in an attempt to get you to change it back and Ryoko stabs him. Why did you feel the need to set her up as your protector, did you think Kyon would try to get you to reverse what you did and figured Ryoko would be the best deterrent or is it that deep down you wish Kyon dead?  
**Yuki: Huh?

**Ryoko: How does it feel to know that in an alternate world you got to stab Kyon during a cold night, watch him drop on the side walk and start bleeding to death?  
**Mini: Deprived. Why wasn't it ME?!!!  
Yuki: It was you.  
Mini: You know what i mean you literal moron!!! Wai---aggggggh!!!!*shoved into Yuki's dufflebag*  
Dria: Remind me not to get Yuki-chan angry...

**Dante's blade**

**Hahaha, this seems like fun, i liked the way you make the characters talk heh for a moment i think they are the real ones answering  
**Dria: Uh...yeah that's, uh...kinda the point...

**So i got some questions as well(sorry if my english is bad or any mistakes hehe)**

**Koizumi  
**Does it hurt to smile so much?  
Itsuki: Of course not! i have strong facial muscles...it makes me the best kisser around, hahaha!  
Dria: I don't beleive it...  
Kyon: He really is the perfect man...* Non-gay comment you Yaoi freaks*  
Dria: No! i mean i don't beleive he's the best kisser! i should prove this!!  
Kyon: Uhh....

**Could you say no to Haruhi once?(at least just once?)  
**Kyon: Uh, i could, and i've tried... but would you like to have a homicidal woman clawing at your throat?

**Nagato  
Do you think there is life on Mars?  
**Yuki: I could ask. I have never been there.

**What does it felt to stop a knife with your bare hands?, or do you feel any pain at all?  
**Yuki: All i will say is that it will hurt you.

**Since Kyon said on one of the later chapters he cares for you on a sister way, do you fell the same way for him but as an older brother?  
**Yuki: I really don't care at all.  
Kyon: Really?  
Yuki: No.  
Kyon: wait...what?

**To all SOS members, less Ashahina  
Does Ashahina´s tea is really so good?  
**All: YES!  
Dria: Woah, is it just me, or did an orgy just happen?  
All:*Wiggles their bare feet*  
Dria; Ha, that's what i thought.

**Kyon  
You hate your sister or in the inside you feel that big brother love for her?  
**Kyon: A little of both.  
Imotou-chan: Waaaaah!!! Big brother said he hates me!!!!  
Kyon; What? Are you retarded?! i just said i loved you, too!  
Imotou-chan: I know, i just wanted you to say it again, hee hee.  
Kyon: Rrr.....you little...

**If the situation arrived and you needed to protect the SOS brigade and its members, would you do it even if it meant to put your life on the line?(you know what i am talking about, i mean the life and death moments of your life)  
**Kyon: Maybe, but only for Mikuru or Yuki...hehe.  
Haruhi: **Censored for extreme content**

**What weird supernatural and all powerfull force made you talk to Haruhi and how do you tolerate her? or is she really not that bad as you put her  
**Kyon: Put her? Huh? And i only talked to her cuz she was weird...jeez, i don't know.

**What do you think about Koizumi´s metaphors?  
**Kyon: They're a load of shit.  
Itsuki: Watch your language.  
Kyon: You see what i mean!?  
Dria: I think the starvation is going to his head...Here, have a taco. ^^ *stolen from the Last Unicorn*

**Haruhi  
Why did you get Kyon on the SOS if he is normal? (no offense Kyon)  
**Haruhi: Well, i needed a grunt, of course. People would think the Brigade was weird if we din't have at least one mundane on the crew.  
Kyon: I hate when people ask that question.

**Do you really think Kyon is the idiot you say he is?  
**Haruhi: Yes.

**When you were little you liked John Smith?  
**Haruhi: that's a statement, not a question.  
Kyon:*grin* So it's true?  
Haruhi: Oh look...grass...  
Dria: I SWEAR I QUIT---- oh you mean...nevermind...

**Would you cancel the restriction of drink alcoholic drinks or you will let it forever?  
**All: Let it be!!!! Let it be-ee-ee!!!!

**Well that is all for now, i hope you can read and answer the questions, so keep it up with the good work Dria-san, even if you dont answer i will still watch this fic to the very end XD**

**

* * *

**

**Lightning Master Zero**

**Very good story one of the best ive read in a while. if it would be okay i have two questions fot them myself.**

**One: Kyon what is your favorite Mikuru outfit.  
**Kyon: Ah, well i adore the maid costume, because it covers the most skin.  
Mikuru: Kyon, that make me happy you said that.  
Kyon :Just doin' what i do.  
Dria: Well, i like her in nothing.

**Two: for the girls if Each of you had three hours alone with Kyon what would you do in them? cand be anything at all. (sry Itsuki but to me you have more sugar in your tank than Little Richard)  
**Haruhi :Make him fix that stupid website he made!  
Yuki: Read.  
Mikuru: Try out some new tea recipes!  
Dria: _Rape him.  
_Kyon: *in high voice* Let him go!

**

* * *

greenthunder17**

**question to everyone what would happen if kyon and only kyon was to turn female in front of you guys  
**Kyon: What!?  
Haruhi: Not much. I doubnt being a girl would change his awful attitude.  
Yuki: *Shrug*  
Mikuru: We could dress him up real cute!  
Imotou-chan: Yay! i have a big sister!  
Itsuki: Well, that would be interesting.  
Tsuruya: OMYGAWD YES!!!!!!!!!!!

**and to haruhi would you treat kyon the same if he was always a girl or would you treat him like mikuru?  
**Haruhi: Probably treat him the same. He's so boring, it really doesn't matter what gender he is.  
Dria: so in other words, you would love him no matter what?  
Haruhi: WHAT!? NO!!!

**technicly this is not gender bending if it only affect one person  
**Dria: Uhm, yeah, it kind of is.**

* * *

**

**facexorxvalue**

**Ah... I love you all and the image of some if not all of you nude... (How inappropriate.)  
**Dria: No worries, i get to see it all the time ^^  
**Kyon... now that I know your whereabouts, (our at least some of them), I WILL FIND YOU. Watch for me.**

**Haruhi~ Dont worry. I'll give him back~  
**Dria&Haruhi: You Better

**

* * *

**

**VoidArmour**

**Interesting concept. Let's see...**

**SOS Brigade: Who (or what) actually is Tsuruya?  
**Mikuru: S-she's a friend of mine...?

**Tsuruya: Who (or what) actually are you?  
T**suruya: What the hell is that supposed to mean, jackass?!  
Dria: Tsuru-chan!!!  
Tsuruya: What?!  
Dria: Don't call the guests jackasses!!!  
Tsuruya: WHY?!  
Dria: It's rude!  
Tsuruya: But he--i mean--and i--and....forget it...

**Itsuki: Since I doubt your organisation would have overlooked placing someone in Haruhi's school, who was meant to observe her before you transferred in?  
**Itsuki: You seemeed to have spelled Organization incorrectly.  
Kyon: they have.  
Dria: Hmm, yes, so it would seem.  
Mikuru: I believe so.  
Yuki: Interesting observation.  
Haruhi: Indeed.

**Haruhi: Don't you think the world would be a better place if there weren't any wars in it?  
**Haruhi: Hell no. Then what would we do with all the cool l4z3r (4nn0n5?  
Kyon: I don't think they use laser cannons in modern warfare.  
Haruhi: AHMA CHARGIN MAH L4Z3R5!!!  
Kyon :Of course you are...

**Yuki: How widespread are the IDTE interfaces, and how would I go about making contact with one?  
**Yuki: Try banging your personal computer with a shoe, or just keep returning to this fanfiction to contact myself. That seems the simplest way of going about it.

**Mikuru: Do you have any investment tips?  
**Mikuru: Buy cheap, sell big.  
Dria: Wow, it's like your personal motto. *Gropes Mikuru*  
Mikuru: AAAAii!!!

**Ryoko: Surely you must have known about the Kyon in Yuki's spare room when you tried to kill him, right? So how did you think it would have turned out if you succeeded?  
**Mini: Of course i knew! i know everything! I'm far greater than any prototype such as Nagato!  
Yuki: You didn' have a clue did you?  
Mini: I'LL KILL 'EM!!!

**Kyon: Have you ever considered the possibility that the supernatural brigade members have been lying to you as to precisely who has the god-like powers?  
**Kyon: ...What?  
Dria; GASP! Oh, that's one of the most brilliant observations i have ever heard about the series!!!!!! Care to elaborate!?

**Haruhi: Have you ever considered making an Abridged Series?  
**Haruhi: What? Like of The adventures of Mikuru?  
Kyon: No i think like, other anime.  
Haruhi: Oh! Like the Naruto one?! I loved that! "Are you serious?! thats like santa clause delivering frozen treats to all the good children of the world on christmas eve and then crashing into a tree!!!" Ahahahahahhaha!!!  
Kyon: Uh, yeah, something like that...

**All: Who would you most like to see alternate-gender versions of?  
**Itsuki: Haahah, Suzumiya. It would be humorous to see if her ideals changed the way her powers worked.  
Haruhi: Mikuru! Jeez, a boy that sexy...YUM!  
Kyon: Itsuki, just to have another cute girl around.  
Haruhi: Aha! So you WOULD date Koizumi!!!  
Kyon: Knowing him, he'd probably turn into a lesbian...  
Itsuki: That hurt.*SMIIILE*  
Mikuru: Ah! i'd like to see kyon! Then i could have a cute little girlfriend! Heehee!  
Kyon: *Awww...*  
Yuki: Myself.  
All:*STARE*

**That's all for now. Thank you very much for your time.**

**

* * *

**

**gcleemon**

**nice, nice oh and i have a question for haruhi: if she saw kyon and kouzumi making out on the roof would she yell "YOAI ALERT" into a megaphone , take picutres of it or do both?  
**Haruhi: Both! Both! i would totally so do both!!!!!!! *Grabs Megaphone* YOAI ALERT YOAI ALERT!!!

**

* * *

**

**Gladiator Beast MCK**

**Very well then. My Gladiators and I shall provide you with epic questions of epic stupidity.  
**Dria: Well, i do like anything epic.

**Kyon: How come the Disturbed song "The Night" sounds like a certian situation you got in with Haruhi?  
**Kyon: Holy sh---- thats eerie. Um.. I wrote it, hahaha

**Yuki: Can you sing "Hatsune Miku no Shoushitsu?"  
**Yuki: No, becuase i don't like leeks.

**Itsuki: Would you be bothered if you were in a room filled with Naruto fanatics?  
**Ituki: *hyperventilating* n-no, n-not one bit....H-hinata.... Rock lee....Hoo hee hoo hee....*stressed breathing*  
Dria: He CAN get pregnant!

**Mikuru: Have you ever resorted to using physical violence in anything? (Not including alternate universes.)  
**Mikuru: Never! There hasn't been a need for it yet!  
Haruhi: Except in bed.  
Mikuru: Eh!? N-no!  
Haruhi: Hehehehhe...

**Haruhi: How many times have you found explcit pictures of you and the brigade and how do you react to them?  
**Haruhi: Huh? I find pics all the time, and they're nothing that unusual.

**Everybody: How would you react if I told you that there was an alternate universe where Kyon has random kung-fu, Haruhi has a magic red guitar, Itsuki gets his ** kicked for opening his mouth, Yuki has a pro wrestler for a superior, and Mikuru gets assaulted by poke balls?**

Thanks for taking the time to look at these. Be sure to check out the CRACK brigade! (Sorry for the two plugs. I couldn't resist XD.)

**

* * *

**

**Juko the Creampuff**

**Guess who... Heehee**

Dria:oh HAY-ELL noes.  
**okay well here are the questions of the second  
Extra: (because my old question was worded wrong) this is for yuki, how would you explain the fabric of time being connected to haruhi's interal cravings.  
**Yuki: I wouldn;t know. That is more Mikuru piont of knowlege.  
Mikuru: Ah! Well, thats classified anyways.  
**Now for the creampuff's to ask their favorite characters questions.**  
Dria: Ah! Jukojukojukojukojuko---suko? Why are you....  
**Suko: I deserve to go first. Okay haruhi, knowing you can get what you want, why not use it for more "selfish" reasons?  
**Kyon: Uh, thats kind of the ONLY thing she uses it for...  
Dria: I think he means for more...lemony purposes.  
Itsuki: Ha. You said lemon.  
Haruhi:*ignoring the others* Well, because i'm such a kind an considerate soul who dearly love Spreading joy all Over the world with Suzumiya haruhi!  
**Furry: I wanna ask something! okay itsuki could you beat kyon in a fight?  
**Dria:( I love you Furry~chu! Say hi to Inuko for me!)  
Itsuki: No. He won the last two times.  
Kyon: You mean the second movie and the scavenger hunt? Those dont count as fights Koizumi...  
**Buko: yuki this one is for you. What do you think is an appropriate way to keep haruhi in balance?**  
Yuki: Sex.  
Kyon: She said APPROPRIATE.  
Yuki: It's not like i said "Sex ith Kyon." Haruhi finally being able to react by pure instinct would help her become more comfortable with the way things are.  
Kyon: ....  
**Luko: kyon, why do think haruhi relies on you so much if she is the one that does everything?  
**Kyon: She doesn't do _anything_ but get us into deep---- shoez.  
**Juko: and mikuru  
John: wait your favorite member is mikuru?  
juko: she makes me feel happy  
suko: you fruit  
furry&Dria: yay fruits  
buko: no furry he is calling juko a fruit  
furry: which fruit?  
suko: the worst kind  
furry: brocolli  
**Dria: Noes! I like broccolli!  
**Luko: uuhh juko just ask the question before Dria gets mad that we are taking all the fan space  
**Dria: Thank you Luko, you took the words right outta my mouth.*pouts lip*  
**Juko: fine... umm mikuru, what is in the future that isnt classified?  
**Mikuru: Well, ah...its very...futur-ish?**  
Scott: now for Dria's question  
Juko: nothing personal now  
Scott: you mean like when she hit me and  
**Dria: Finish that sentence, John.  
**Suko: are you retarded  
Furry: Who's retarded?  
Juko: nobody furry  
Furry: who's that  
Suko: you  
Furry: yay im a nobody  
Scott: well let me see... Dria how would you shape the world  
Juko: that's it?  
**Dria: Really?  
**Scott: what  
Suko: That was nothing like your last comment  
Scott: hey at least I didnt ask her another personal thing like why am i forced to stand and watch her watch two guys strip  
**Dria: Cuz you have no control over that babe.  
**furry: yay  
Suko: furry thats a bad thing  
**Dria: No, Suko, that's a good thing.  
**furry: yay  
Suko: fruit  
Furry: what kind of...  
juko: okay let me wrap this up, we are stealing spotlight  
furry: but this is a story  
suko: that is true  
**Dria: It's not!  
**juko: anyways let me ask this one last question to all of you, even your flying piggys. What is your favorite phrase to say?  
**Haruhi: KYON!!  
Kyon: What?  
Haruhi: Thats my phrase. What about you?  
Kyon:*It's not "Totally?"* I don't have one.  
Itsuki: Mine is smile and the world smiles with you.  
Dria: Fruit...  
Itsuki: What kind of---  
Dria: LEMONS!!!!  
Ituki: Owowowowowoowow!!!*pelted with lemons*  
Mikuru: Mine is "I love you"  
Dria: Mine too!!! *sqwee!*  
Yuki: LOL  
**Scott: well i guess thats enough questions for us  
Juko: maybe we should make our own story like this.  
Furry: and talk a lot  
suko: you do that anyways  
Scott: Shut up you guys, Dria is going to get mad  
**Dria: (It's ok its ok....)  
**(silence)  
Suko: so?  
**Dria: RAWR!!!!*OMNOMNOMNOMNOM on Suko's face*

**

* * *

**

**inuzuka pau**

**This is fun stuff. I'll try.**

**To Haruhi: You must answer this with honesty. Do you actually have a chocking fetish? Seriously, always dragging Kyon by the tie... Have you even thought of a safety word? (It can be banana)  
**Haruhi: What the hell is a chocking fetish?  
Dria: I think they mean "Choking."  
Haruhi: Oh...wait. Banana? What kind of fruit would say---  
Dria: Lemonsssssssssss....  
Haruhi: Uh...ok...  
Dria: Heay! Do you happen to be blonde and short and obsessed with maplestory?!?

**To Itsuki: Have you ever tried to be, you know, not so damn ambiguous? Would it kill you to give a straight answer for once?  
**Itsuki: Have you ever noticed that i have REALLY shiny teeth?  
Mini: Nope, the idea never crossed my mind. Fruit...  
Itsuki: What kind of---  
Dria; LEMONS!!!*pelts Itsuki with Lemons*  
Itsuki: *owowowoowowowow*

**To Mikuru: Tell the truth, you're just feigning that moeness, aren't you? There's no way someone can be that adorable.  
**Mikuru: Y-you think I'm a-adorable!? Oh! thank you, thats too kind!  
Dria: Damn, she's a natural at this kind of thing...  
Mikuru*I know, right?*  
Dria: *Mind officially goes BOI-YOI-YOI-YOING!~!!!*

**To Yuki: As an avid eroge user, you must answer me this question: Do you cheat to beat them, like you did with the match with the Computer Club, just to ge to the naughty parts faster?  
**Yuki: No, i play them completely. If i care to watch hentai, i will go straight to the source.  
Dria: Eww...

**To Kyon: I have no question for you. I'm mad at you, you know. You have your own personal harem of hotties and you do nothing to get any of them. You are a disgrace to all the heterosexual males in the world. Be gone from my sight!  
**Kyon: Hey, now, i resent that! What makes you think i HAVEN'T tried!? And maybe im just a romantic kinda guy, and i don't look at girls like peices of meat! Besides, who in their right minds would go after Haruhi?  
Haruhi:**RRRR**

**Now I think I'm done. I'll leave now.**

**..........................................................................................................................................................................................................  
Dria: *Breathing super duper hard***

**Kyon: Wow, are you ok? You're hyperventilating.**

**Dria: So much work...*huff* Barely an hour...*huff* Yukiiii....**

**Yuki: Thank you for reading , please leave questions via review. Your comments are appreciated and pondered.**


	11. Q8 PART 1 AND MY RETURNS!

*****ASK HARUHI AND THE SOS BRIGADE TRIUMPHANT RETURN WITH A GENDER BENDY CHAPPIE!****

It has NOT been a year…No way, no how. How did I let time slip away from me like that! After leaving all of you hangin…..  
SAD FACE!  
So anyhowzy, I are back!  
And it IS the official gender-bendy Questin session, so here we are!  
Oh, and this will be in TWO PARTS! No one has been left out...its just ALOT.  
Also I have a request for future questions…. Since I was a bit overwhelmed at first. Please only comment on THE VERY LAST CHAPTER POSTED, that would be a big help to me. *smiley face* That's my only housekeeping thing, so….here's the SOSDANBENT!

KYON! : A feisty girl with a looooooooooooong ponytail!  
HARUHI! : a short-tempered boy with crazy yellow headphones and a knack for tugging on said ponytail!  
MIKURO!: A teeny tiny baby-faced boy-loli….with a hidden weapon set to "max" in his pants! (heehee)  
YUKITO! : A tall bibliophilic guy with a pervy mind and the most beautiful silver hair….aahhhh…  
ITSUKO! : A slender, smiling girl with dashing good looks and…well….she sorta plays for the other team.  
And none of the others are important enough really, to do this for….*avoids deathglares*  
LETS GET IT OOOOOOOOOOON, OOOOH!

Karsten69  
Okay Karsten69 here~

**Brigade members cover your leader's ears for this question.  
**Dria: GLOMP OPPOURTUNITY! *glomp!*

**what would happen if Haruhi got drunk and tried to re-create the world while drunk? how would that affect reality?**  
Kyon: Actually, my guess is that Suzumiya can hold his liquor pretty damn well…  
Itsuki: That would make sense, tee-hee…

Dria: Tee-hee? Oh, that's right, duh….gender-bent…lol.

**Also to Mikuru & Yuki would you date Kyon if Suzumiya gave you permission?**  
Mikuro: *shakes head quickly*  
Yuki: Only if she treats.  
Kyon: You are such a GUY….  
Dria: *sweat drop* *so confused*

**That's all from me this time**.

IHKF  
2010-06-20 . chapter 10

**LOL Once again, I give you the ROMFL award! XD**

**I've got more questions!  
**Dria: I do not friggin' DESERVE it! But I acceptz!

**Haruhi: What would you say if I told you that there was a chance that you could move our entire race to another planet, which planet would you move us to?  
**Haruhi:*massive jaw-drop* …..K-PAX!  
Kyon: You mean the movie with the dude who ate that whole banana?  
Dria: teeeeeheee*insert perv joke here…I'll leave it to your imagination*  
Haruhi: It wasn't a movie you fool girl! That was a message from space that we so happened to stumble across!  
Kyon: …..and ordered from Netflix….?  
Haruhi: I told you, woman! Netflix and Hulu! Mind control! It's all there!

**Kyon: What do you think the others' reactions would be to you purposly slamming your face into the brigade dr while Haruhi takes pictures?  
**Kyon: They would probably be a fine mix of WTF and amusement.

**Itsuki: *Moves away slowly* Uhh...just so that I don't get hit with lemons..-_- Anyways, if you could be anybody from a movie, ANY movie, who would you be?  
**Itsuki: Not to sound comformed or anything, teehee, but I suppose Edward Cullen. I mean, who else can sparkle as much as I do? *SHIIIIIINE*  
Dria: ACK! THE LIGHT! IT BUUUUUURNS!*pauses a moment* HI-YA!*hurls lemons at random people*

**Mikuru: Ever considered gauze?  
**Mikuru***As a girl for a moment cuz as a boy it won't work, rofl***  
Mikuru: Ah, well, it hurts, you see.  
Dria: And then your chest swells. *nods*  
Mikuru: Right! It totally defeats the purpose!  
Dria: *ZAP!* you're a boy again!

**Yuki: as somebody else pointed out, your name means 'snow.' Do you like winter?  
**Yukito: It's not much different than the other seasons…. And I don't celebrate any religious holidays…  
Kyon: You aren't an oddball anymore, what happened?  
Dria: I think Boy Yuki is more cynical….and talkative….slightly.  
Kyon: and only slightly.  
Dria: He uses adjectives at least.  
Kyon: True.

**Keep it up, Dria! This is pure AWESOMNESS!  
**Dria: THANKIEHANKIES! I will, I pwomise!

**Anmynous****  
**

**This looks kind of fun. I guess I'll try, too!  
**  
**Kyon: Do you ever worry that Haruhi's power affects your free will? Say, she wants you to like her, but not too much... you did admit to not** **outright hating her.  
**Kyon: I don't hate him. In fact I think he's quite the looker, sure, but I'm not worried about him overthrowing my emotions for something stupid like that.  
Haruhi: Who says it's stupid!  
Kyon: Me. What're you gonna do about it? Hit a girl?  
Haruhi: ….*Yanks Kyons Ponytail*  
Kyon: YEOWCH!

**Itsuki: Same question.  
**Itsuko: PPPFFFTTT! I'm more worried about him making me like ANY boy!

Kyon: and I suppose girl Itsuki is a bit more….  
Dria: Obnoxious?  
Kyon: A bit.

**Yuki: (You don't have to answer this one, but... if Suzumiya had sex, would it inevitably be fantastic due to her power and her believing it would** **be?)  
**Dria: (why would you ask YUKI? Roflmao!)  
Yukito: I imagine it would be, but I do think it would simply be from the fact that Suzumiya-san has an overactive imagination-excluding that that contributes to his reality altering-and also the fact that well… he's kind of a man-whore….

Dria: Heh, Yuki said "man-whore."

**Kyon again: I don't think we ever see or hear of your dad, does he still live with your family?  
**Kyon: Of course he does! He's the one who feeds Shamisan when my sister forgets!  
Haruhi: That's really all you have to say about your dad? He feeds the cat?  
Kyon: It's not like my family is that exciting.  
Haruhi: You are the most mundane girl I know…  
Dria: Was that just an excuse to say "mundane?"  
Haruhi: …  
Haruhi: …so?  
**  
Haruhi: Don't you think it's unhealthy for Yuki to be so silent and withdrawn?  
**Haruhi: Of course not! Silence makes the bishie! It's worth major attraction points to be a stoic and beautiful man!  
Mini (Ryoko): That and…you know health really isn't an issue with a robot…

**Mikuru: How did you get so good at making tea?  
**Mikuro: Well, it wasn't easy, and it took a lot of…tee hee…time!*gigglegiggle*  
Haruhi:*stares blankly* Boy moeh?  
Dria: It's possible, I assure you.

**Thanks for your time!**

**GIGA DRILL BREAKER  
**

**Question for Kyon: Do Pony tails turn you on?  
**Kyon: Well, you know, it's not like I look in a mirror and go all, "Oh I'm so hot, I would totally do me," or something. But sure, guys wearing ponytails, eh, yeah I guess it's ok.

**Question for SOS-dan which is made of manliness GAR badass:  
Your opinions on Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, what are they?  
**Dria: A "BS COMMENT", just cuz I was told not to write one. ^^ *smiley*  
John: she never goes the extra mile for the fans

Furry: cuz walking hurts.  
Dria: *Stabs John and shoves Furry into pocket* ANYONE ELSE CARE TO INTERRUPT?  
*also I have no clue as to what that is, and I soooo don't feel like pretending I do. So heres a little song!*  
Yukito: *THIS IS THE BEST BURRITO, I'VE EVER EATEN….

Itsuko: Yum yum yum!  
Yukito: *THIS IS THE BEST BURRITO, I'VE EVER EATEN….

Itsuko: Yum yum yum!  
Haruhi: WITH PLENTY OF BEANS  
Kyon: AN' PLENTY OF CHEESE  
Mikuro: AN' PLENTY OF RICE  
ALL: OH ISNT IT NICE?

**P.S. Haruhi your nightmare about Kyon and blue giants wasn't a nightmare just ask Kyon yourself.  
**Haruhi: *staaaaaaaaaare*

**P.S.S Kyon, I had no idea you're like Mac from Foster's Home for Imaginary friends when it came to sugar, I feel sorry for you. Here's a giant Hershey's bar  
**  
***Throws 5 lbs of milk chocolate at him*  
**Dria: *catches in mouth*  
TsuruyaDude: Chocolate kill of the week?

**Good day.  
**Dria: THAT IT IS!

chad001  
2010-03-06 . chapter 10

**Very good job, I'm loving what you're doing here!**  
Dria: Aw! Thank ya's so!

So, for all the of the cast members:

**What would you do if you suddenly found out that Kyon was more powerful than all of you combined, or weirder than all of you combined? After all, he is the common link between to Gods, 2 Esper organizations, 2 alien races, and 2(3) time travellers, not including himself.  
**Haruhi: BS!  
Dria: But I actually have that card….*ignore us, playing B.S. lol*

**To every female: What would you do if Kyon suddenly gained a VERY large libido, or an aphrodisiac?  
**Kyon: If I _WHAT_?  
Dria: Um….considering Kyon's a girl right now….MAKES FOR AN AWSOME QUESTION!  
Itsuko: Ah, wouldn't that just be the epitome of interesting? *smiiiile*

Kyon: Whoa, hey, thought you were a lesbo?  
Itsuko: Eh, I'm not picky. *smiiiiiiile*

**To Ms. Dria: Do you think Kyon could escape from your hideout if he was allied with a slider?  
**Dria: Miss…missssss Dria…I think I like it! And duh, why don't you think Tanigutchi is here?  
Kyon: Because he's annoying and not a slider?  
Dria: 'ZACTLY!  
Kyon: Wait-

**Just like her kiss, I think Haruhi is denying the fact that she knows John Smith's true identity. Anyone have any particular reactions to this remark?  
**Yukito: Because she really doesn't know?  
Itsuko: She's a total air-head?  
Kyon: I'm a very good liar.  
Dria: THREE B.S'S IN A ROW MAN!  
Haruhi: Aw, you win….  
Dria: I love this card game!

**To Tsuruya: to ask in a more polite manner, what is exactly is your role or objectives for the events that are occurring? It is common knowledge of your connection to the Agency after all...  
**TsuruyaDude: What're you talking about? OMG ARE YOU PLAYING BS?  
Dria: Yeah, and Haruhi's kicking my ass again, sadly, heh.  
Haruhi: I've gotten my groove back, dude. 3

**Kyon: if you were to reveal your "identity" to Haruhi, how do you think the Data Overmind would look, right before the world was reset?  
**Kyon: Honestly… I've always imagined a UFO or something, hee.  
Dria: *(since I love this question I have to input- I could totally see a big ol' candy man, since those giants in the Closed Spaces look like huge gummy Eva's, lol, unconnected I know but hey.)*

**Haruhi: Kyon is John Smith, deal with it. How does the world look now?**  
Haruhi: Huh, you say something?  
Dria: NO! NOT AGAIN! I wanna play Peanut Butter, Haru-chan!  
Haruhi: No ways loser!

**To everyone: I am about to teleport a knife into Kyon's chest, any comments?**  
Haruhi: 'Kay.

**Oh and finally, Yuki: The Data Overmind is very ticked, come home soon, ok?**  
Yukito: Why? If the Data Overmind was angry with me, wouldn't my mission have been terminated already? Also, I can't come "home," because I was manifested directly on the Earth. So this statement is invalid. Sucks to be you.  
Dria: YUKITO!

**Well, that's it, Ihope this might get picked, but mroe than that, i hope this gave you a good laugh, it gave me a good laugh writing these. But seriously Yuki: COME. HOME. SOON.  
**Yukito: I _am._

John Smith  
2010-03-05 . chapter 10

**Alright if you picked these then thanks Dria-kun!If not then I can see why...  
**Dria: Why? Oh God, don't say that….oh and diggin' the name, dude. 3

**Alright first question is for miss Suzumiya:Is it true that Taniguchi is the guy you only dated for five minutes in junior high?In case you don't know who Taniguchi is he's Kyon's weird friend with the black hair.  
**Haruhi: Um, In case you haven't noticed, most girls in Japan HAVE black hair. Actually, almost everybody does.  
Dria: *remember the bender.* So in otherwords, you have no clue whatsoever?  
Haruhi: Yup.

**Second question is for miss Suzumiya again:If you were a god and could shape the world as you see fit would you keep Kyon around?If so why?If not why?  
**Haruhi: Isn't this like, what? The third time we've gotten this question?  
Kyon: Something like it.  
Haruhi: Well, I'm bored with it. I mean I appreciate the fans that recognize my god-like charm, *winku* but reeeeally…  
Dria: Well, some people don't read the other responses. Or previous chapters…at all…  
All: *staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare*

**Miss Nagato:Can you try and smile?Please?For Mini-Asakura?  
**Yukito: Why would I smile? I am content enough knowing the hilarity in his pathetic desperation.  
Mini: WHY I OUGHTA-MMMMF!  
Yukito: *stuffs Mini in duffle bag.* LOL.

**Imotou-chan:Have you ever thought of acting?I got some friends in Hollywood and they could give you a chance.  
**Imouto-Bro: No way! Mommy said TV gives you lice!  
Kyon: *When'd mom say that?*  
Imoutou-bro: I'm only allowed to watch TV for a half-hour every day, so I don't think I'd get paid very much for a half-hour.  
Kyon: *Being on TV isn't like watching it!*

**Kyon:Are you blind or something man?Or am I the only one that sees miss Suzumiya affection for you?Do I have to tie you up again and make you do a dare fic?Oh and make sure miss Suzumiya ears are plugged for this one  
**All: Huh?*looks up from  
Kyon: B.S.  
Haruhi: Damn! So close!  
Kyon: How is it "close?"  
Dria: *** Wait, AGAIN? Do I have to open some whup-ass?***

**Kyon once again:Do you hate Koizumi?If so is it because he keeps friggin smiling?If so all you have to do is knock his teeth out.  
**Kyon: Suppose it's true.  
Dria: NO! You're NOT getting' my giant pliers again!  
Kyon:….But I uh…don't necessarily_ hate_ her…  
Dria: …oh.

**Koizumi:If you happened to be an esper...Which you aren't!What would be some of your super awesome powers?  
**Koizumi: Ahhh, well I'd adore the power of reading minds and futures… telekineses would be amazing!*Smiiiiile*  
Kyon: *She's just naming the normal powers of an Esper she DOESN'T have!*

**Miss Asahina:If you were from the future...Which you aren't!Would there be any super awesome weapons in the future?  
**Mikuro: I'm sure there are—would be! Yes, yes, like, ah, big… guns and such things…um…yeah?  
Kyon&Dria: *Such boy-loli! Such skill! Such overflowing PASSIOOOOOOON!**Duel Anime Fist Pump*

**That is all thanks for capturing them and forcing them to answer our questions Dria-kun!  
**Dria: Thank yas, my pleasure! *looks to Kyon* Heh, indeed my pleasure…. 3  
Kyon: *Crap! I forgot she's Bi!*

Zeek72  
2010-03-03 . chapter 10

**Let's see what I can think of this time.  
**Dria: Probably more than I can, heh.

**Haruhi:  
**  
**If you had to assign a character class (knight, warrior, white mage, priest, merchant, etc.) to each member of the brigade, your self **included, what would they be?  
Haruhi: AHH! A bold and-  
Dria: Say creative.  
Haruhi: What?  
Dria: SAY IT.  
Haruhi: Ah, a um…Bold and creative response my good man?  
Dria: I like this question.  
Haruhi: Um, yeah. Ok, well! I myself of course would be king! King who rules over my SOS knights! Kyon of course is my little bar-wench, ha!  
Kyon: YOUR what?  
Haruhi: Koizumi with her bright smile and cunningness surely would by my noblest knight!  
Itsuko:Why thank you.  
Haruhi: Yukito with his black arts and cold stare would be a black mage!  
Yukito: …  
Haruhi: Mikuro, my little boy-loli! A bard who frolics free and pure!  
Mikuro: Ah! K-kyon, I think Suzumiya may be getting carried away…a bit…  
Kyon: Yeah…  
Haruhi: I KNIGHT THEE!

**Ryoko:  
**  
**1: What's your opinion on GLaDOS from the game Portal?  
**Mini: Oooooooh, whats in heeee-eeeere?  
Dria: ***PPPFFFFT! Sorry! Had to! Had to!***

**2: When you confronted Kyon in the classroom what would you have done if he had pulled out a bigger knife and was actually able to fight you one on one?**  
Mini: I simply would have erased the bastards weapon. Duh.

**Kyon:**

**1. Who'd you place bets on in a fight, Koizumi or Fujiwara?**  
Kyon: HA! Man, i'd use my money on payin to SEE that! WAHAHAHAHA!

**2. This one's just because i'm wondering and want to see the out come. Among the data interfaces who do you think is hotter, Yuki, Ryoko, Kimidori or is it possible that you like Kuyo more?  
**Kyon: Why the hell would i like Ryoko moew? He tried to friggin' KILL me? Obviously, Nagato-san.

**This is to all members of the brigade (Ryoko too if she feels like answering):**

**Let's say your world is a dream and every one's a character made by the dreamer. Who, among your group, do you think would be the dreamer?  
**All: **STARE AT HARUHI***  
Haruhi: Hic hic?

Dria: Ok...phew...thats all folks! Watch for PART TWO OF MAH RATURNINZ! Yu-chan! Take us out!  
Yukito: Thank you for reading. please leave any comments or questions via reveiw. Your thoughts are appreciated and pondered.


End file.
